Dear So and So

[Biciclista]

thanks Catrin! If a forum isn't aggressively run by a nutcase, generally, normal people can interact there too.

Uh, Crankin,
that BIL of yours sounds like someone I would want to stay far far away from.. YIKES. what makes him think a new house will make his daughter's cancer go away?
I bet she'd rather be with her daddy than watch the whole family going mad with money schemes. YUCK

[OakLeaf]

Wow Crankin. That makes me so sad for everyone involved. Especially your niece obviously, but everyone else too (including you for having to deal with it). Ugh.

[shootingstar]

well, that's probably why I look so good in comparison. I do get a lot of good out of it. They aren't going to make me any sadder, and I still do have to process my grief.
It just keeps coming in waves.. but there is more space between the waves now.
Interestingly, i had one woman pegged as the one who really wallowed in it, and in the last month I can see that even she is improving. There are whackjobs everywhere, but i think most of the people on the grief forum are simply people who lost their spouse and are in need of a little commonality. Your mother in law, cousin, father, friends just do NOT get it. It kinda takes one to know one.

You're giving yourself time to process but you're here. where some of us grieve more privately but know that life surges ahead. We just know that it's ok to step aside and sit down quietly before continuing onward.

[Crankin]

DH told me this morning that he never told me, but that he has seen stuff on the net, written by the niece with leukemia... all stuff stating and showing what kind of luxurious house she wants (with pictures as examples) and lots of stuff about what type of hot guy she wants to marry. I guess she has absorbed her family values by age 15. I just watched a thing on Today show about the over-sexualization, etc of teens/girls and its relation to social media.
This is more upsetting to me than it should be. I consider myself to be quite progressive and I wasn't exactly the poster girl for good behavior at age 15. But, somehow, I knew money didn't solve all.

[Scrappy]

Dear Soon-to-be-X-Husband who decided to leave 4 weeks before my ACL reconstruction surgery, (which is happening this week! 10/25)

The transmission in the car went out (I told you it was going for months) and now you are stuck 1200 miles away and need a ride home? And all of your so-called friends (oh yeah, the 1 you have) won't make the drive out to get you? And the train won't allow you to board with your 4 bags of smelly, diesel soaked, work clothes? So now you call me to come get you? And then you want to drive MY jeep instead for an undetermined amount of time and put 1,000's more miles on the poor old thing until you figure out what you want to do about another vehicle? Hmmmmm....

[indysteel]

((((Scrappy)))). I assume you said no. I'm truly sorry you're going through this.

[Biciclista]

Scrappy JUST SAY NO!!!!!

[malkin]

Absolutely, say no and mean it!

[Catrin]

Scrappy - hang in there, say no and don't allow him to change your mind. It saddens me to hear you having to go through this.

[Scrappy]

Thank you for the support ladies. (((((HUGS)))) I wish I could say NO but he's essentially got me by the proverbial tail. In this case it's the financial tail. He knows I can't work or otherwise earn an income (I'm a massage therapist) for at least 6-8 weeks after the surgery, and we burned through all of my cash savings earlier this year replacing windows in the house. He's threatened to change his paycheck to another account that I have no access to and my son and I still have to survive somehow. So I'm stuck with the situation.

One thing is for sure, I am never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever getting married again.

[OakLeaf]

(((((Scrappy))))) Talk to your lawyer. Most states, child support should be set up very soon after the papers are filed, and has to be taken directly out of his paycheck.

I don't know which knee you're having done, but even if it's the left knee and your car has an automatic transmission, I don't think they'll want you to drive right after the surgery. Get a doctor's excuse and use it.

[indysteel]

If memory serves, this is Scrappy's son from a previous relationship. Short of her husband having adopted him, I don't know that support is an option. I'm sorry that he's doing this to you. It's shameful. Wanting out of a marriage is one thing, but there are better and worse ways to take leave. He's obviously chosen the low road. May his bad karma catch up with him.

[marni]

Dear Tamoxifen,

Bye Bye, so long and farewell- for two months at least.

Had my mammogram and ultrasound today and everything came back clear. Yay for 1 year and 4 months.

Had a long talk with the Dr. who opined that since the cancer causing the mastectomy was none invasive and since it was giving me so many problems, that I should try going off the tamoxifen for a couple of months and see if things improve. If they do then there is one set of options, if they don't then there are other options. At any rate this is all hopeful.

Thank you everyone for listening to me whine and moan about the tamoxifen poisoning and general lack of progress in all things physical, endurance, mental and emotional.

[indysteel]

Yay, marni! I hope you start feeling better soon!

[Crankin]

Two weeks to go until my exam. There's a very real chance I won't pass. I know the material (been studying like crazy). It's the way the test is set up. It does not mimic real life professional practice. It's hard for me to explain, but when I meet someone and do an assessment, I consider everything and get history about everything. On this test, this is not the case. It's really tripping me up. I signed up for a site on the web where I can do tons of simulations and get test taking tips, but with such a short amount of time, who knows.
Why does the Commonwealth of MA require this test, when other states just require the one where it's just 200 multiple choice questions about theory, diagnosis, treatment, etc.
Well, I know the answer to this one, actually.