Dear So and So

[bmccasland]

Dear Lazy Neighbor,
I picked up the old paint scrapings out of my side yard and your driveway yesterday, so the wind would quit blowing them around. I realize that you're the baby of the family, but you're in your 40's now and should be able to pick up after yourself. I realize that you don't like yard work - your ratty yard is indicative of that, but if you start a project, you should at least clean up after it. We've had several lovely days in the past week where you could of picked up the mess. I take care of my rented home as if it was my own home, while you live in your parents home scot-free. Maybe I should call your big brother to straighten you out?

So when you do have your house painted, would you please let me know so I can move my car. Considering the care and attention you give to everything else outside, I have a bad feeling that my car could get painted too, especially since my driveway is so close to your house.

Your neighbor, who's tired of living next to a slob,

[kajero]

PAX
My thoughts and prayers are with you. I am also sending you as many hugs and a few more than you need. This can be so hard. And it can be so hard to patient and understanding sometime.

I just went through this with my Dad, although we didn't have a Dog.

If you can afford it, can you have some kind of relief help come in? We used "Visiting Angels." They were wonderful. At first we had them come in once a week for three hours (the minimum) and then when summer came on we had them come out an additional day to hep my father bathe. The three hour breaks did wonders for everyone.

We also very fortunate with the medical situation. There are now geriatic doctors than make house calls We were able to hook up with a fantastic doctor.

Once again, I send my prayers. I would send some pertinent quote, but what can more than I "feel" for you do? Please remember to take time for yourself (somehow) and I pray things work out for you soon.

[Biciclista]

Dear TE ladies
boy life can sure be a b#$@$ sometimes. I try to keep stuff in perspective (tearjerker ahead) and my DH wrote something amazing to another cyclist in late June (he died in July)
I am sharing it with you guys because you have been awesome to me and hey, a little perspective never hurts anything.
the a cyclist who had an injury shared this with me, Donald was responding to her complaints:
"From Donald, when I was feeling down, this is what Don wrote to me on BJ, just weeks before his passing:

'I know our situations are a bit different, B***a, but here's my take on this, for what its worth. After a couple weeks in the hospital last fall, I sorta knew that this was going to be a permanent change in my life. I didn't know what lay ahead, but I wanted my life back. The more I lay there reflecting on that, the more it became obvious to me that nobody had taken my life. This was my life, my "new normal" so to speak. At this point, even typing is difficult because of the met that has now attacked my right forearm and the blood clot in the right shoulder area that causes massive swelling. It is becoming obvious that my days even doing short rides are nearly done, and there are moments when I "want my life back", realizing the futility of that thought process. It is so very important to me to recognize that if I long for what I cannot have, I miss the opportunity to recognize the blessing of what I DO have. Time is a precious commodity, and I honestly believe that we need to make the most of every moment, especially if we have loved ones (most of us do, I think) who we care about. It is my experience that if I waste time focusing on the things I have not gotten to do or am not going to be able to do, I really cheat myself out of a lot of opportunities. If, on the other hand, I can find the silver lining in things and take the time I would waste fretting about the couldn'ts focusing on my gratitude for the wonderful things in my life at any given moment instead, my life is pretty doggone good.'
"

[Red Rock]

Biciclista,

How nice of that person to share that with you. Even in his own writing. When those things come up, they can make your day. Thank you for sharing it with us. I love his description of the whole change of his life and how he was going to deal with it. When my husband had Cancer, he was active too, he had his own days when he was not going anywhere. So I appreciate his thought process on the whole situation. I will definately struggle with this whenever I get to that point.

Red Rock

[Biciclista]

i hope you never get to that point, Red Rock!

[emily_in_nc]

What a beautiful note from Donald, and thanks for sharing it with us, Mimi. To me, even though I never knew him personally, he seems like a really "old soul" who had simply done all that he was meant to do in this lifetime, including achieving wisdom, perspective, and grace -- even in the face of something so difficult. We should all be so fortunate.

*hugs*

[indysteel]

What Emily said. I read parts of Donald's blog when he died and was struck by his openness and honesty. It seems that he consistently approached life with a sense of gratitude, even in the face of difficulty and doubt. He sounds like quite the man; quite the spirit. Thank you for sharing him with us.

[alexis_the_tiny]

Dear life,

Ouch.

That's all I can muster the strength to say.

[redrhodie]

Mimi, that was beautiful. An attitude to aspire to. I hope to remember those words often enough.

[OakLeaf]

((((((((Alexis))))))))
((((((((Mimi))))))))

[Biciclista]

What a beautiful note from Donald, and thanks for sharing it with us, Mimi. To me, even though I never knew him personally, he seems like a really "old soul" who had simply done all that he was meant to do in this lifetime, including achieving wisdom, perspective, and grace -- even in the face of something so difficult. We should all be so fortunate.

*hugs*

He really did learn fast. I could never figure out how he could let go of stuff as easily as he did. I kept trying to learn from him, but I guess I am stubborn, and like to hold on to my resentments, my expectations, my disappointments. HOW did he do that? I guess I had better keep trying. That's the least that I can do, in his honor.
One of the neatest things about him is that he left a huge paper trail. There are literally hundreds, maybe thousands of posts of his on bikejournal. A lot of them are just inane silly things but others are well thought and full of good advice. Ohwell. sorry to be rambling here.

[azfiddle]

Thanks for sharing that Mimi. It's so easy to feel sorry for yourself...Don's comments on bikejournal certainly left an impression on my husband- and I know that was just a small slice of his interaction with other people.

[Owlie]

Thank you, Mimi.

Dear department (my adviser and one other person in particular):
Why can't you grow the (bleep) up and deal with your issues like adults instead of dragging students into it?

Me.

[jobob]

Thanks so much Mimi.

[Adventure Girl]

...It is so very important to me to recognize that if I long for what I cannot have, I miss the opportunity to recognize the blessing of what I DO have. Time is a precious commodity, and I honestly believe that we need to make the most of every moment, especially if we have loved ones (most of us do, I think) who we care about...

He was a very wise man. This is a beautiful sentiment that we can apply to so many situations. Absolutely beautiful. Thanks, Mimi, for sharing Donald's thoughts (and for sharing Donald) with us.