Dear So and So

[snapdragen]

(((Mimi)))
(((Marni)))

++1

[divingbiker]

Mimi, I've been away from TE for a while, and just learned recently that RaleighDon had gone to that long bike ride in the sky. I'm so sorry for your loss, but am so glad you have lots of things to remember him by.

Marni, hang in there.

[Biciclista]

thanks Divingbiker. I think one of the reasons I am posting here is because I had NO IDEA what it would be like to lose my spouse. I mean, i knew it would hurt and be sad; but the sheer enormity of it all ; i had NO Idea. I had no idea that time would become meaningless, some things went too fast, some went too slow; and meanwhile, I forgot ALL sorts of things that happened before, during, after.... It has been the most significant thing that ever happened in my life. bigger waves than getting married or having a kid. SERIOUSLY!

anyway; I think comparatively, I am doing VERY Well. I am on a widow's forum and I give myself A's in comparison!

[Crankin]

Just a warning Mimi... beware of what you hear on a widow's forum. These types of groups are notorious for people who just never are able to heal. Not just widow's groups, but all kinds of groups on the internet. I've treated people who have become more depressed over their particular situation because of all of the negativity/misinformation they have heard on line. Of course you should give yourself an A.
Of course, I don't do any forums, except TE, as I just feel weird about it. But, when I lost my first baby at 8 months of pregnancy, I went to a group for grieving parents. After going to that, I kind of snapped out of my own grief. Really quickly. There were people there whose kids had died 10-20 years ago. I didn't want to be like them.
I know it's not the same, but your statement reminded of this and I hadn't thought of that group in years.