Dear whoever is blowing stuff up tonight:

After listening to stuff explode for the last hour, I know where you are. And I also know that ALL fireworks (even sparklers) are illegal in Denver. But most importantly - I now have the fireworks tattle-tale number for the police programmed INTO MY SPEED DIAL.

The last straw was the one you set off at 11 last night that made it sound like my house was collapsing.

Be warned,
Your exhausted neighbor