Getting married- ? do I change my name

[SheFly]

When we were married, there was a spot on the marriage application for both the man and woman to indicate the name they would use after marriage. This to me, indicates that a marriage certificate would have been sufficient if my DH had wanted to change his name at the time.

Oh, and since we're a state where marriage is legal for everyone, I would also ASSUME (ahem) that in the case of two men marrying, one (or both) would be able to legally change his name as a result.

SheFly (MA)

[DebW]

When we were married, there was a spot on the marriage application for both the man and woman to indicate the name they would use after marriage. This to me, indicates that a marriage certificate would have been sufficient if my DH had wanted to change his name at the time.

Oh, and since we're a state where marriage is legal for everyone, I would also ASSUME (ahem) that in the case of two men marrying, one (or both) would be able to legally change his name as a result.

SheFly (MA)

Actually, the federal Defense of Marriage Act prevents the US government from recognizing name changes for same sex couples via marriage licenses. Such couples CANNOT change their social security card or get a new passport with their new name to match their state driver's license and other ID unless they get a court-ordered name change. There may be equality in our state, but definitely NOT in our country.

[andtckrtoo]

I HATED my name growing up! Hated it!! 28 years of being teased to high heaven because of my last name made me not as appreciative of the symbolism as I may have been. So I was thrilled to be able to change my name to my first husband's last name. I love it so much (made me sound like a character in a book), I kept it even after the divorce because my daughter has the same last name, and I did not want to go back to my birth name. When I got married again, I kept my name for a while - and actually kept that name, but used my new husband's last name, too.

Grog is correct - you can use any name you want as long as do not use a name in an attempt to defraud. I have many friends who use both their birth and married names. It's only when legally signing documents that you really need to make sure you are using your legal name (of which you only have one). I ended up changing my name (5 years into my marriage) when my DH got airline tickets to Hawaii with me as my first name, his last name. To change the name of the ticket was harder than changing my name, believe it or not, and it didn't really matter to me. My name is now officially My first name, my 1st husband's last name and my 2nd husband's last name. As my birth last name is fairly common, my parents were not upset.