Getting married- ? do I change my name

[BikeDutchess]

I kept my birth name. Both my first and last names are unusual and I didn't want to give up part of it (even though my first name and my DH's last name would have sounded pretty good together too). Both last names are unusual enough that I would have had to spell either one for people frequently, so that wasn't a deciding factor. Initially we also worked for the same company and I felt it was important to keep my own professional identity.

It took my MIL the longest to accept it. When I got my green card and proudly showed it off, she asked when they would put "my real name" on it! Luckily my DH's sister also kept her birth name when she married and I wasn't the odd one out anymore.

Once we had kids we did have to make a choice - we didn't want to saddle them with hyphens. We chose his last name for both kids. Our oldest has my last name as a middle name. We haven't really had issues with the kids - nowadays there are so many blended families that introducing myself as "Mrs Mylastname, XX Hislastname's mom" doesn't cause anyone to skip a beat. I do carry mini birth certificates (showing both of our names) in my wallet just in case.