Quote Originally Posted by Bluetree View Post
What to do? I was sympathetic at first, but now it's making me very annoyed. I want to just slap them upside the head and yell, "Stop-being-such-a-crybaby-if-you-aren't-happy-then-do-something-about-it-without-destroying-your-family!"

Does that work? Any suggestions?

Here is my suggestion and experience. I have managed large groups of people who because of my job think I am their shoulder to cry on. It is both a male and female thing, just happens at different stages in our lives. I have had people tell me some really personal things, I mean REALLY PERSONAL. I never tell anyone at work these things. Maybe that is why they come to me. Because they trust me. Anyway. From my personal experience I can't say enough about taking charge of your life. Why rely on another person for all of YOUR happiness? I have told this to people. Sometimes I just listen and nod my head, because they is all they want.

So maybe for you, they see a female who has the opinion they would listen to. They don't want to go to a therapist because that is like admitting you have a problem. But seeing this is causing you some discomfort, you should take care of yourself. Simply say, you sympathize with their situation however you are perhaps not the best person to help them out and while you want to remain friends, you are feeling a little bit weighed down by this situation.

Then if that doesn't work the more upfront approach: Guys stop complaining, weigh all your options, take into account the negative consequences to what you think will be a positive outcome, get off your behind and do something. But I don't want or need to be your life coach.

And slapping people upside they head feels really good sometimes too.

Okay, that is just MY opinion.

Sign me, divorced female who did something about her un-happy ex-spouse.