Dealing with Mid-Life Crisis

[BleeckerSt_Girl]

Unfortunately I can speak from experience about this issue. My husband has done this with a couple of women in our cycling club. He is having a major mid life crisis. (We’re married 20 years!!) I run a profitable small business and take care of most of the things at home. (As most women do). I admit that I have gained weight over the 20 years but I am in the process of getting back into shape for a ½ marathon in April and also ride about 75 miles a week in the summer.

I guess that men get restless in their late 40’s and think that someone new will solve their problems with themselves. I would suggest to that she tell the guys to discuss it with their spouses. The pain involved for the spouse is incredible.

I feel for you Jane- I hope things work out for you.

I tend to think that it is simply not appropriate or responsible for someone to dump their middle aged angst and marriage problems onto someone substantially younger than themselves. Especially an older man whining to a younger pretty woman. They should seek sympathy/comfort/advice/help from a more appropriate source- a therapist, a male peer, and/or their spouse.

This issue kind of reminds me of that rather miserable Bill Murray movie "Lost in Translation".
In that movie both the middle aged man and the younger woman were trying to fix their respective marriage boredoms by having a relationship with each other, a sympathetic stranger/acquaintance, rather than trying to work on their relationships with their spouses. They sought a cure for their boredom in the empty novelty of a 'new person'. They acted as though they were noble martyrs for putting up with their spouses (though apparently not lifting a finger to fix anything or even level with their spouses) ....but I just found myself unable to feel any sympathy for either of them, aside from just finding them pathetic.