Reading this makes me very sad, and reminds me of all I read while preparing our wedding last year. Just having a look at the brides' online forums made me cry. It's not a fashion show, it's a celebration of marriage!!!! I can't believe how much of a stronghold commercialism has now on weddings.

I don't know how she is normally, but maybe she could be asked what she thinks the day is really about, and whether it's worth alienating close friends and relatives over it? Maybe she does think it's worth it. My brother's wife, whom he is now thankfully divorced from, thought that this was the Most Important Day of Her Life and that Nobody Would Be Allowed To Contradict Her In The Year Leading To It. Among other things, she wanted to tell my father how to dress, which did not work very well with him. Seeing that we were accessories in her parade, rather than being invited to celebrate their love and joy, my boyfriend at the time and myself gently pulled away from it (I was supposed to be a bridesmaid and my bf a groomsmen). Her wedding did make it into a magazine because everything was so well coordinated (for real!!) but all the family members and a few friends were alienated in the process... Very sad.

Oh, and where did "we want your presence, not your presents" end up? I can't believe that attitude regarding the gifts and spendings.

As they say, "Only real friends tell you when your face is dirty."