A little milestone for me

[rij73]

Thanks for the replies...

I didn't mean to make DH sound so ogre-like. He really is a great guy. He just has funny ideas about how to motivate me. My self-esteem is a little fragile, and he doesn't really know what to say to keep me going. He's the type who responds to criticism by trying harder. I need more positive input than he does.

[mimitabby]

Thanks for the replies...

I didn't mean to make DH sound so ogre-like. He really is a great guy. He just has funny ideas about how to motivate me. My self-esteem is a little fragile, and he doesn't really know what to say to keep me going. He's the type who responds to criticism by trying harder. I need more positive input than he does.

exactly. My DH has done the same thing, thinking it would help. When in fact, it just hurt my feelings and made me mad. You and I are the same in that respect.

[DDH]

Thanks for the replies...

I didn't mean to make DH sound so ogre-like. He really is a great guy. He just has funny ideas about how to motivate me. My self-esteem is a little fragile, and he doesn't really know what to say to keep me going. He's the type who responds to criticism by trying harder. I need more positive input than he does.

Congratulations on your solo. Good for you for trying new things. Your DH is like mine. In fact he can say something to me and a girlfriend say the same thing, just in different tone, and I take it much better from someone else.
He thinks constructive criticism is the way to motivate someone and it doesn't work for me.

I hope you have many more rides like this one that you enjoy immensely.

[MomOnBike]

First off:

YOUR BIKE IS NOT WASTED ON YOU

(. . . if you like it and it makes you smile.)

Secondly:

If my DH had said any of those insensitive things I'm reading on this thread, he'd be my ex-DH. Fer Pete's sake! (sputter, sputter, cuss, snort)

{deep breath}

More calmly - if you are riding and enjoying yourself, there is no problem. It's OK not to be the fastest, or even the 100th fastest bike on the road, so long as there is a smile on your face. If the bike doesn't make you smile, then You are wasted on It. Life is too short to ride a bike you don't love - at whatever speed.

Please don't forget that.

[MrsB]

My DH is exactly the same way. He says things that really hurt my feelings. Like we will be out on a nice ride and he will have to make the comment that we only did 16 miles. Only? Come on? He also mentions how I tell him that I average 17 mph on my solo rides and how come I dont when im with him. Like he doesnt believe me or something. Hello?? Check my computer. It doesnt fib. Well last night I was at the point that I didnt really even want to ride with him because I new he wanted to ride fast and go for a longish ride. Well I finally psyched myself up and out we went. I rode as hard as I could and stayed in the front. There were actually a few times that I looked back and he was Waaayyyyyy back. YEAH! I pushed myself so hard and it actually felt good. This morning he actually called me from work to let me know that the back of his legs were really bothering him. Hes probably coming down with something because he usually kicks my butt everytime out. I was just in a zone last night. I probably wont do that again for awhile but it felt really good.