Queer-eye for the straight woman

[KnottedYet]

LoriO - it's ok, you didn't offend anyone! A discussion started on a tangent to your great story about shopping, your story was fun and I liked it. Don't lurk!

[snapdragen]

Nothing offensive about your title at all Lori - please continue to contribute to the TE group.

[Trek420]

Come back, please don't lurk! Not offended in the least and besides, we'd all miss your little green hat.

Oh, wait, that's not you.

[Zen]

we'd all miss your little green hat.

Oh, wait, that's not you.

in my imagination it's a helmet for some type of cat sport.
Or possibly space exploration.

[Savannahgurl]

I applaud you for having the nerve to post that Snap. I have watched so many TE members get 'run off' by self rightous TE regulars. I will continue to lurk occassionally, but this will be my one and only post. I prefer to post of other forums where the welcome is much warmer no matter who you are.

I work at Wal-Mart, love George Bush and am proud to be a Republican, have a husband who is fighting a worthwhile war in Iraq. I am not ashamed to eat beef, to believe in God and America, and am going to spend my refund check at Wal-Mart on stuff made in China. AND I ride a bicycle.

I'm really disappointed that another lighthearted post has been turned into yet another soapbox on TE. Are we so wrapped up in our own PC world, that we need to school everyone whenever we feel a possible slight.

It's not just this post, and the use of the word queer. It's the "I'm so much better because I don't shop at walmart", "I never eat beef so I'm a much better human", "all conservative Christians are stupid".

People have been driven off these boards by the holier than thou behavior of a few, and I'm sick of it; to the point where I wonder if I even want to be a part of this community any more.

//snap - straight, queer loving, pagan, liberal that believes in tolerance for everyone, not just those you agree with.

[VeloVT]

howdy,
I stand by my post earlier (I really do feel that everyone here should be accorded a right to express when they've been offended), but I just wanted to make sure, LoriO, that you realize that I did not mean to compare **your post** to someone making offensive racial jokes at a dinner party. I was trying to illustrate what happens when people are not permitted to say when something offends them, in response to Snap's post; I was not trying to imply that your post somehow comparable to that situation, and for the record I don't think it was in any way.

I'm sorry that some people seem to be feeling that this is not a welcoming community. I have on occasion been irritated by what I perceived as judgmental or self-righteous posts, but overall I think the level of maturity, wisdom and respect on these boards far exceed what I have seen elsewhere, and I even apply that to the people who have offended me in the past. I will try to be more sensitive in my posts in the future, and I'm sure others will too.

But maybe I'm a weirdo because I didn't find the "controversial" post that was removed to be horribly inappropriate; perhaps it could have been worded a bit more gently, but it belongs to the category of speech that I believe we should protect here.

[redrhodie]

I applaud you for having the nerve to post that Snap. I have watched so many TE members get 'run off' by self rightous TE regulars. I will continue to lurk occassionally, but this will be my one and only post. I prefer to post of other forums where the welcome is much warmer no matter who you are.

I work at Wal-Mart, love George Bush and am proud to be a Republican, have a husband who is fighting a worthwhile war in Iraq. I am not ashamed to eat beef, to believe in God and America, and am going to spend my refund check at Wal-Mart on stuff made in China. AND I ride a bicycle.

The only thing that matters to me is your last sentence. Isn't that what this forum is supposed to be about? Why choose this as your only post?

Go ride your bike, and tell us about that, why don'tcha

[KnottedYet]

Well, the thread was winding down to apologies and apololgy-accepteds and general mature good-feelings all around again, so he had to do something to try to make it vicariously thrilling and watch the women flip out again.

My teenaged son reads me some of the forum-baiting he finds on the internet. It happens everywhere. Don't let it get to you.

[redrhodie]

Ha!

[Starfish]

I have watched so many TE members get 'run off' by self rightous TE regulars.

Nobody can get "run off" unless they are willing to be "run off."

I don't agree with an awful lot of what I read in this forum, and I have read some downright offensive language about things I believe in deeply, characterizations I don't think would be tolerated here for one minute if they were aimed at a lot of other belief systems.

But, it is always my choice to decide where to pick my battles, and to weigh what I get from this community, compared to what troubles me about it. No different than any other group of frail and faulty human beings (including me) I might belong to.

I have sometimes needed to take a break from TE because of these issues, but that is my choice. No one is going to "run me off." I happen to care a lot more about the big choices people make in life when it comes to what they believe, than I care about what kind of bike they ride.

But, this is a cycling forum...it is what it is. For me, there is more benefit in staying than letting a few intolerant people ruin my association with the huge numbers of wonderful women on this forum who have been incredibly kind and helpful to me.

[Veronica]

Frankly, I'm kind of wondering who has been "run off"? Sure there have been people who have come and posted a bit and then moved on. But were they "run off" or did they just choose to move on? How do you know when someone has been run off? I guess when they post that they're leaving. But I've always viewed those posts as a plea for attention. But hey I'm just an insensitive clod who eats meat, but only humanely raised and only cage free eggs, believes in God, but not in heaven (don't ask!), refuses to shop at Wal Mart, tries desperately to not buy goods made in China and speaks her mind. What do I know?

Oh and I spent the first 18 years of my life on welfare, so I do understand why some people cannot make the choices I have made. I am extremely thankful that I have been fortunate in my life and can now choose to follow my conscience without worrying about where my next meal is coming from. Don't hate me because I've been lucky.

I think movement is typical of a lot of forums. There's a watch forum I drop in on once or twice a year now that I was formerly very active in.

I think not taking things so personally would help. It's not always about "you."

V.

[redrhodie]

I think KnottedYet was pointing out that we are being baited to keep this thread alive by someone who actually may not be who she claims to be.

[Zen]

No ones ever been banished from the kingdom as it were, but I do know of two people who chose to leave.
Sometimes people take things too personally or don't have the wherewithal to simply brush it off.

[SadieKate]

No ones ever been banished from the kingdom as it were, but I do know of two people who chose to leave.
Sometimes people take things too personally or don't have the wherewithal to simply brush it off.

I beg to differ. TE does have a history prior to April 2007.

I know of at least one poster who was banned. The poster persisted in disobeying forum rules.

[Veronica]

Hey Zen I really like your end quote. I'm going to turn that into a poster for my classroom. And it's given me an idea for Read Across America Day which is celebrated on Dr. Seuss's birthday or close to it, if it's a weekend day.

V.

PS Yes, I do remember someone being asked to leave, but that's different from being "run off." Running off makes me picture pitch forks and brooms in hand...