Dear So and So

[Starfish]

I know you thought you were being clever and funny as you critiqued my lycra covered behind as I passed you on the trail yesterday, but you really ruined my day.

The response:

To girls: "Well, at least I can tone up and lose weight. How are you going to grow a brain?"

To guys: "Well, at least I can tone up and lose weight. How are you going to grow your tiny pen**?"