So sorry you're lonely. I feel for ya. Surrounded by a bunch of riders but can't find the right ones to ride with...I'm kind of in the same boat (I'm new to SLC from NorCal). For me it's much more motivating to ride with folks (rather than alone).
Whenever I go visit my folks in Halcyon/AG, I ride out the canyons to SLO. I always see tons of people riding. I never really ride out LO way cuz of the wind and it requires me to get in the car (from my folks' place). Check some of the shops' bulletin boards in SLO. I'll bet they have a women's cycling group there. Have you ridden with the SLOBC, aka the "SLOBs"?
SadieKate and I will be in the area in March, but will be focused on the Solvang Century. Have you checked out that ride? It's a huge crowd but fun. They have a half century and a full. Here's where we previously discussed it: http://forums.teamestrogen.com/showthread.php?t=4905