First off I'm 43...well, I'll be 43 the end of April, so I've started claiming it now.

In the "good old days" I could set a clock by my cycle every 28 days. Then about 12 years ago it switched to every 21 days. I felt cheated, but dealt with it.

So, come December, I skipped and I didn't think anything of it, skipped again in January and thought, hurrah! It's ending for good! Pregnancy never crossed my mind because I'm a lesbian and as I've told my gyn, my wife has had a hysterectomy so it's not possible

Come Feb I start and am bummed, but I think...oh well, it was good while it lasted. The only problem is it has NEVER ended...well, that's not true, it ends and restarts and stops and spots and oh what fun! I've always been a person that bleeds very heavily the first couple of days and then it tapers off, so the beginning of Feb heavy bleeding, tapering off, and spotting and bleeding off and on ever since.

I haven't had any hot flashes thankfully, but I have found that I'm depressed and tired and extremely forgetful. The other day I went into Walgreens for toilet paper and envelopes and came home with M&Ms! Last night I had to email my son's therapist to ask if he had an appointment this week (he has one every other week.)

I finally sucked it up and made an appointment for Monday just to confirm that it is perimenopause. That goes to show what a disruption all this has been in my life because my ded is $1750 per person and I don't EVER go to the doc.

To make this bike related and not just a rant I'll say I have no interest in getting on the bike and I love riding, especially mountain biking. I need to get on, but I'm tired, I don't feel good and I'm depressed. I struggle with endurance as it is. My partner gleefully speeds along with the 16-18 group for 45 miles and I struggle with the 12-14 for 25. On Friday we're supposed to do a Good Friday ride that's 35 miles at 15 and it's a no drop group and Saturday our club is riding with the local high school MTB race team. I'm considering pulling the covers over my head and hiding for the weekend.

I've read the average for perimenopause is 4/5 years, but can last up to a decade. I want to know how homicide doesn't occur more often if that's the case?