Therapeutic Riding (or: my ride away from Heartbreak Hotel)

[owlice]

Wow, cool forum and great name! Found this site while looking for a solution to a skin issue (and I think I found it, as posted in the Health area)!

Never much into sports or physical activity, I was shocked to overhear my son (from my first marriage) years ago describe me as "the athletic parent." Really? Me? I'm a couch potato, and a large one at that! But after my son learned to ride a bike at his dad's house, the kid and I went out to a bike store and I bought not only a bike for him to have at my house, but also a bike for myself. It's a Giant Sedona, and is the only new bike I've ever had; bikes I had as a kid were always hand-me-downs.

The kid and I took to the trails. When my husband of two years and I were courting, his best friend got a fatal illness and died within the year. He was visiting me when we learned his friend had died; we went out that day and got him a bicycle, too. He hadn't had one since he was a kid. We rode that day, and the saying is right: bicycling IS incompatible with melancholy.

My husband and I had talked during our multi-year long-distance courtship about riding the 184-mile C&O Canal Towpath someday; I was thinking this would be the year, since my son starts college this fall.

A few months ago, I learned that my husband has been having an affair which started five months (!) after our wedding. Since he wants to pursue that relationship.....

Goodbye, husband.

I really thought he was it for me, that we would be together forever.

I took to my bike, which I hadn't ridden much in the past couple of years.

Hello, bicycle.

It's almost impossible to cry and bike at the same time.

And I'm riding the C&O Canal Towpath by myself this fall.

Biking as therapy.

[Flatlander]

Wow. I don't really know what to say except, "You go, girl!"

[indysteel]

Ditto to the "you go girl.". I'm very sorry that your husband has made the choices that he has, but I'm glad you've found such a positive way to cope with it. I was a fairly new cyclist when I went through a breakup myself. The bike has taken me to some amazing places--both physically and mentally. I hope your journeys are just as fulfilling.

[runningteach]

I am so sorry about your husband but glad that riding helps. It is very therapeutic.

[ny biker]

Ouch. So sorry.

Do you live near the towpath? There are plenty of MD/DC/VA folks here, so we might be able to meet up with you for parts of your ride.

[Pan Dulce]

Wow. I'll echo what someone else posted; it sucks that your husband made such poor choices, but good on you for finding a good way to cope. I find cycling theraputic too - I find that it just 'blanks' my mind, and I can't think of anything else but my body and my bike. Good luck to you, dear. I hope you stick around the forums.

[BikeMomma]

Owlice,

I'll venture a guess that just about all of us here understand completely about the therapeutic bit. My bike has taken the brunt of my frustrations through the years and then dished the pain right back to me. By the end of each ride, my woes seem much more manageable than they did when I clipped in to begin it.

Helmets off to you for taking control and refusing to be the victim of your ex's affair. Hope things fare better for you from now on and that you find your true soul mate, as you so deserve!

Cheers,
~BikeMomma

[tctrek]

Good riddance to him! You deserve better than that and glad to hear that you are rocking it out on your bike! It must have been very hard to go through that, but you will heal in time and riding your bike sure beats becoming a couch potato!!

[kenyonchris]

You could be me....I really started biking with my second husband, who I loved terribly, terribly. I never really loved my first husband, we were married young (I was 20) and stupid...we were good friends but not much more. I thought my second husband was THE ONE....but he never felt the same about me. I don't know if he actually carried through with his feelings for the other woman, but he had them, and that was enough.
I thought biking, since it was something we did together, would be too painful for me to keep up. But it hasn't. I bike more now than I did.
Keep pedaling. It will get better.

[owlice]

Thanks, all; I appreciate it. You're very kind! Yeah, the man made some really poor choices and has been really hurtful; this shocked a lot of people, not just me. Sometimes I have trouble wrapping my head around it.

kenyonchris, I'm sorry you've been through something so similar. I know it'll get better; I've had many dark days and am sure I'll have more of them, but the only way out is through, so through I go. Maybe with the bike, I can go through faster, but even if it's not a faster through, I'll emerge from it stronger, with quads o' steel!

BikeMomma, for new soul mates, I'm thinking Ben and Jerry. Good thing I'm biking!

ny biker, I'm in the DC 'burbs.

I'm likely to have a lot of questions as I prepare for this -- I know nothing about multiday away rides, but I'll bet lots of people here do and hope folks'll share!