Thread Drift

[Trek420]

snap, Chloe is a brave dog! Watch her conquer fear of scary shadows and bridge.

Bikingmomof3, thanks for the detailed wrap of of TE TD. Yes you missed TE TD controvery, I'm sure Kit knows what page it was, the sig line is gone. The table feels much better now.

Kit, add this to the TE TD TOC

kelownagirl-cool terrarium. so far there are no toads in my toad house, maybe they want something more elaborate.

Salsa- Love the wedding Kimono story "both of you, figure it out I'm off to Japan"

Winddance & BMO3 both-feel better soon. If not extra sleep the cat nap will help you and maybe the cat.

[Brina]

I have a problem with people who say, "If you can't have kids you should adopt, there are so many children available in foster care."

First, children in foster care are not the sole responsiblity of those who cannot conceive the good old fashioned way. Anybody can choose to adopt one of these children. I remember having this conversation with somebody no longer in my life. She learned we were pursuing treatment to conceive and she told me we should adopt. I asked her why she and herr dh were not adopting and her response was, "well we can have our own". Like that somehow exempted them from responsiblity.

Second, the foster care system in the United States has as its stated mission that the ideal resolution for a child in foster care is reunification with a parent or member of the his/her biological family. That is directly at odds with my goals - a child, a family, a permenant relationship. I have seen many, many situations where the biological mother is given chance after chance to prove that she has cleaned up her act, often dragging on for years and through second, third and forth chances. The foster parents hang in their, loving and providing for the child and praying for the day that parental rights are terminated and they can legalize the family that they have built, but then the bio mother manages to convince a judge and a social worker that this time she really is clean for good and the child gets "returned" (in quotes, since the child often has never spent significant time with the bio parent) to the "rightful" "parent" - As opposed to the people who have loved, supported, educated and card for the child.

Third, infertility is the only medical condition that people seem to judge others for pursuing. Insurance rarely covers it, which most fertile people seem to think is good as they worry about the effect on inurance rates. Family members will remark upon the waste of money and the small chance of success. Fertility patients are told, "it is just meant to be" or "perhaps God did not intend you to have children." Could you imagine if similar criteria were applied to other illnesses or disabilities? My sil had stage 4 metatastic breast cancer and continued to pursue treatment after treatment even though the chance of a cure was <2%. Insurance covered it all and nobody complained about the effect on their insurance rates. Nobody told her, "it is just meant to be," or "perhaps God just wants you to die." Nobody would dare to say to the scientists who research spinal cord injuries that they should pursue more "worthy" illnesses and that some people were just no meant to walk. Just as those suffering from other illnesses should not be condemned for seeking medical treatment, the infertile have a right to adress their disability.

[Trek420]

Brina "I remember having this conversation with somebody no longer in my life. She learned we were pursuing treatment to conceive and she told me we should adopt. I asked her why she and herr dh were not adopting and her response was, "well we can have our own" Like that somehow exempted them from responsiblity."

owwwww, besides being insensitive I agree it also smacks of somehow that adopted kids are "not your own"

".....I have seen many, many situations where the biological mother is given chance after chance to prove that she has cleaned up her act.....then the bio mother manages to convince a judge and a social worker that this time she really is clean for good and the child gets "returned""

I agree again, I think more would adopt if it was easier here and if they did not fear that the adoption could be reversed, delayed...a good friend adopted and orphan from China and no, I don't know if fertility conditions had anything to do with it.

Their daughter is the light of their life. Part of his decision was that they could do so easier than one from here with less of a wait.

My concern is more just getting kids out of foster care system.

After a tour of this good organisation I learned it's a huge problem.

http://www.lincolncc.org

Many foster care parents do a great job, some of these kids do get adopted but then at 18 ... when foster care no longer pays these kids are basicly turned loose.

By this point they may have been in the system for years, the situation that got them there has not been resolved, they may have been passed from house to house.

I had great parents, loving supportive educated family and how hard was being 18??

Imagine how it is for those kids? what happens to them? Well, many end up in jail for one thing.

I don't think we each have to take a kid or even each have to adopt a dog from the pound I hope you are able to have your child the way you want and/or find a way to use and express the nurturing energy you have in other ways.

But as a society we have to care and think about what is the solution?

Ultimately these are all our kids.

[Nanci]

I don't think Knot's "controversial" sig had anything to do with TD. I don't remember thinking it was particularly offensive or controversial, either.

My hand smells weird. I wonder if it has somehting to do with the lunch stop...Only my left hand.

I just went grocery shopping for snakes, at Snakes.

The toads love the water dish/soaking pool. They are funny.

Working the lunch stop was fun. I cut up tons of fruit, made a bunch of pimento cheese sandwiches (we also had PBJ and hummus) and then made gallons of Gatorade.

Now I'm ready for a nap.

Oh, Snap, I used to have a horse who would jump over those white chalk lines on baseball fields. I think you can even fence in cattle with painted cattle grates- you don't even need the real thing. So Chloe is not alone in her thinking.

Hey, wait- gardening experts- I have a mini rose. Am I supposed to remove the deadheads, or leave them alone? And, does anyone know of a reason I should _not_ allow the bitter orange rootstock from my frozen tangelo to turn into a tree in its own right?

[Quillfred]

Duckin' in for some drift....

Lise: This is a memorable line worthy of a novel. I missed him a bit...but I missed him while we were dating! So no big loss. People are funny. I shake my head all the time in bewilderment.

Snap: One very cute dog. Mitzi, an English Bulldog I once had, would absolutely FREAK when we drove over bridges or got on ferries. She was such a neurotic little thug.

Trek 420: They are occasionally showing parts of Aidscycle #4 on the LOGO channel. Was that you I caught a glimpse of once or twice?!?

Salsabike: I agree with the Kimono story being especially fine. Kudos for climbing Fuji--alone

Nanci: Deadheading encourages more blooming. If it's a miniture miniture, just use care to snip and not fingernail-prune it like I do to standard teas. Rootstocks are often sturdy healthy roots from a not necessarily ornamental plant.

I love animal rescue work. I volunteered one spring north of us to care for the wildlife section. Just in time for lots of baby birds, squirrels and Opossums. I wish there was a rescue in Seattle.

Quillfred

[Trek420]

toad question: I would like to place a pie tin of beer (very cheap generic beer) in the front yard to kill (in a humanely pleasantly drunk way) the slugs.

Will this harm toads? I haven't seen any toads but would like to attract toads to the area. Do toads like to drink or will they be put off by cheap beer.

Many places paint the cattle grates, much cheaper, don't have to run drainage under the road and must be just as effective. Very confusing to cyclists, I have been on rides where "gra....oh never mind it's painted" has been called out.

I'm not a gardening expert, and don't play one on TV. I learned from my Mom that it depends on what you want.

Deadheading the plant may get you a second round of blooms because the plant thinks "wait, wait I forgot to bloom, better do that now". Plants are as dumb as cows :::runs away now from cow fans :::::

I know I should snip the deadheads with special deadhead snipping pruners approved by the Queen of Englands cottage gardeners, if I'm out there, see deadheading to do ... I just gently do that by hand, just don't damage the stems.

Since me folks always did the same I figure it's ok.

All I know about roses is I'm supposed to prune back in February and feed them a lot

On the other hand if you want the plant to put energy into root and other growth leave it alone.

I kept buying nursey plants based on their blooms. OOoOH this one's pretty. But they were putting all their energy into the blooms and the plants never got established.

I don't know if this is correct but now even if the whole nursery stock is in bloom... I look for the ones without flowers.

Much more better plant survival rate now.

As for the rootstock, grafting plants I really don't know about but if you want I can ask my Mom, bet she'd know if it's a good idea or not.

Off to lunch with Mom....

[Kitsune06]

Trek- Oh, no polarizing here. Don't worry. FTR, I actually don't have a number for Knot's sig line controversy. Also, I don't think the beer would hurt the toads in your yard. I'm thinking it'd taste like hoppy, rotten grain water to them and they would be far more interested in a fresher supply.

Brina- I agree. There are so many children out there who need parents who will love them. Just because you *can* make your own, doesn't mean... wait wait, wait. I said that in another thread. Back to my "no polarizing here" statement... I think one of the things that can be most prohibitive of adoption is just not knowing the genes going into this child, whether or not drug use was a factor during the pregnancy, etc. when you make your own, you at least have a decent idea of genetic faults/abnormalities/traits present (mom and dad are both bipolar, Dad's diabetic and....) (not me, but you know where I'm going) it'd be a very scary unknown.

I think I *saw* Knot's sig at one point, somewhere, and didn't think it was that offensive...

[snapdragen]

**Adjusting moderator hat** Let's put the controversy to rest. Knot's sig was never complained about. There was a thread that the admins thought would get out of hand, and so it was shut down.

**throws hat in the air**

I just ran into the most amazingly stupid woman at Target. I was checking out, a man and his little boy were in front of me. The boy has a Thomas the Tank Engine Lego set; I asked if it was for him. He nodded solemnly, and I told him I thought that was very cool.

Dad uses his charge card, signs the little screen thing and waits. The checker begins scanning my stuff; then hands me the bag. I point to the gentleman and say "He's waiting for his receipt" She gives me this vacant look, then hands him the receipt.

I step up to the POS thing, and she stands there looking at me. (At this point, I'm thinking cows look more intelligent) I say "I need to pay for my items". She points the the man and little boy leaving the store "Oh, you're not with him?" Uh, no, perhaps you should stop him before he gets home and realizes he just paid $70 for a lego set? She stands there. ***moo*** So I run after him to let him know what happened.

PITA getting everything straightened out. OH! And she tells her supervisor it's our fault - we were talking to each other! So remember, no conversations with 4 year old boys while waiting to check out at Target.

[KnottedYet]

What did Seattle put into the municipal water system?!?!

I'm just so damm happy! It's unnatural! I feel like the whole world has opened up to me, all the possibilities I thought I'd never have again, just the richest most beautiful treasure box in the universe!

I feel alive out to the very tips of my fingers and toes! I love everything! I feel such an incredible sense of FREEDOM. Freedom, and also an odd sense of power.

I feel like there is NOTHING wrong with me! Like I'm actually a pretty nifty person!

Even if I end up single for a looooooong time, I'm not terrified of being single. Seems pretty peachy to me right now! I'm liking it!

Maybe someone slipped something funny into my coffee this morning...

[maillotpois]

OMG Snap, that's so pathetic. I loved the scary bridge pictures, by the way.

nice frog, kelowna.

so I did my last ever marathon this morning. it wasn't even my slowest marathon, but I didn't run much at all, so it was pretty slow. very well supported event. I wore a shirt with ribbons w/the names of my honorees (including SK's dad, snap's friend Bob and Julie ann) - I will put a pic up and do a report when the fire in my feet goes out. my local honoree friend met me at the finish w/a dozen roses. since he'd been the one who inspired me to did it, that was pretty cool. ("honoree" is team in training speak for an honored leukemia patient you are doing an event for.)

I can't believe I missed controversy while I was out doing a stupid marathon!!!

[Veronica]

Yeah, but you did it MP! I was wondering what kind of day you were having.

V.

[Kitsune06]

Whatever it is, I want some. =) Glad things are feeling good for you, Knot!
I take it things are satisfactorily 'over' between you and PITA?
Ah, that liberated 'single' feeling- I remember it so well... living on beer and pizza and as much sake as I could sneak from xdh without him noticing... being obnoxiously 'single' around my taken friends, flirting shamelessly and knowing I was somethin' to look at...

Then finding DGF and being all tingly with excitement, too... on the weekends I managed to visit and all through the week when all I could do was email. Ah! *grin*

Y'know... she's getting home in half an hour. I'm gonna call her.

[Nanci]

Why do you say it's your last, MP? Could it be because (ssshhhh) running isn't FUN?

Snap- I am speechless.

[maillotpois]

thanks guys!

it was a l o n g day, V. start in the dark, finish in daylight (well, ok, at noon). just like a lot of my doubles (not the noon part!).

nanci - running stinks. I know you like trail running, and I can see doing that still. but pounding asphalt for 26 miles.... urgh!!

[Trek420]

snapdragen

don't talk to strangers, it confuses the cows