Thread Drift

[shootingstar]

So I've emailed photographs of 3 different paintings I've made and asked niece, bride, which one they would like as one of my gifts for their wedding.

And they are mixed media abstracts, although you could use your imagination. Yes, art is tough since it's so personal taste-sensitive. Not sure she is the type to demand representational paintings --paintings that need to mirror what one sees in the real world.

[Crankin]

Nice gift idea! Still trying to get some of DIL's art work for my office.
Getting annoyed with all aspects of the home selling process. In 10 years, things have changed. DH took Friday off, so we could do a metric, and now we have to be home all morning for the "stager" to come and tell us what to do, for the open houses. We already know what to do, and my home is minimalist compared to some of the crap we see. Then, I have to miss various group rides for the septic inspection, floor plan drawer, etc. Our agent is telling us people are skittish because of the market, so everything has to be perfect. I already know to take my personal pictures down, and remove crap from the counter. Our house is somewhat unusual for New England, so I guess she is being realistic, but still, it annoys me. Also, I seem to keep meeting "old ladies, "(which I loathe to include myself in this group) who live in condos in West Concord. None of them are specifically for older people, but I hope I don't end up living with a bunch of half dead people!

[snapdragen]

"(which I loathe to include myself in this group)"

I get this! I was at the gym this morning, looking at all the "gray hairs" working out, sadly I think I fit right in.

[Crankin]

When my blonde hair got really brown, I started highlighting it, until I cut it short. Now I just get it colored every 8 weeks. I really have very little grey, just a few strands near my temple, in the part. The blonde makes it invisible. I have no intention of going grey for a long time. First I thought I'd consider it at 65, but now that doesn't seem so far away. Maybe 70? I know we've discussed this here ad nauseum. My take is that if you have beautiful skin and coloring, grey can look OK. Between my freckles and other stuff, no thank you. I may be seen as vain, but the whole idea of looking old creeps me out. I have good genes and pray for the best. I don't want to look 20 or 30, just as nice as my grandmothers looked when they died at 91 and 92. My mom looked super young for her age, until right before she got sick and died quite young, at 67. I don't need to make friends with my new neighbors, just be nice and say hi. From what I've seen, they won't be joining me on 50 mile rides or at Tabatta.

[OakLeaf]

I hate to even say it, but I think it's wise to have a pool of non-athletic friends, if for no other reason than just in case. When I got hurt, a lot of my social life went right out the window. It was kind of a double whammy, and not a good one.

[Crankin]

I do have non-athletic friends, Oak. It's been an effort for me to maintain the friendships, but I've known them for 25 years. One thing that's different for me now, as opposed to when I was younger, is that I am not friends with people I work with. I used to socialize a lot with other teachers, but as the years went by, that got less and less. There is one woman from my old school that I am in contact with and that I see a few times a year. The others are just Facebook friends now! She actually is pretty active, and we usually go on local hikes or go out to dinner.
I guess I never realized what a sub culture there is in the place I live. I was sort of aware of a large number of older women in West Concord village, when I went to the natural foods store (the place you went to), but I didn't realize they all lived around there. Since I consciously planned not to buy a condo in an over 55 place, it seems like that happened despite my decision. We did look at a place in a huge complex that was very diverse in terms of age, etc., but it needed a ton of work and did have a more apartment like feel. And that has a rep as the place where all of the divorced men go.

[OakLeaf]

the place where all of the divorced men go.

Ha!

[Crankin]

Yeah, it's true. At least a few from my synagogue that I know.
I am going to use this forum as my rant space. What kind of person becomes a "stager?", as in the person that comes to your house, before you put it up for sale and tells you all kinds of stuff that doesn't really apply to me. This woman has been told that we are minimalists, we will take all personal photographs down, there are no pets, and no kids have ever lived here. Some of the other things are: 90% of stuff of the kitchen counter should be gone, must have decorative pillows on the beds (as well as 2 pillows on a twin bed), and white sheets. Are they kidding? I don't have decorative anything. I do have 4 pillows on our bed, but the kids' beds (20 and 30 years old) only have one. No white sheets. No rugs, either. OK, I'll take the bath mat out of my bathroom, and leave a puddle of water for the open house. I put away the food processor and stuck the knives in a cabinet. It was very clear no knives should be out (Why? Do they fear murder?). Leaving the toaster oven, can opener, and ceramic holder with cooking utensils out. Gee, I actually cook, almost every night. And she better not touch my coffee/espresso machine.
This woman is coming with people to "move stuff." They won't be moving anything here. We don't have too much stuff!
DH told her that I may not be here, as I am not a fan. Some of this is common sense stuff, but really, have people become so weird that having a bath mat out would make them not buy a house? All of the other townhomes we looked at had tons of ugly stuff and personal pictures, except the one we bought, as they have already moved. The first house we bought in Massachusetts had ants in the dishwasher and a junk car in the yard.
On a fun note, I cleaned out my desk at home, and found lots of cool pictures of some of my classes when I was teaching. I can barely remember some of the kids, and it hasn't been that long.

[Pax]

HGTV has changed the game, everyone thinks they have to have granite countertops and an "open concept main floor". The whole thing irritates me, a generation or so ago parents raised a family in a small 2-3 bedroom house with one bathroom, now everyone in the family "needs" their own bathroom.

I guess I understand why so many people, when asked about retirement, reply "I can never retire, can't afford it".

[emily_in_nc]

Probably depends on how competitive the market is where you are. In a seller's market, you wouldn't need to do all that crap, just keep it neat and tidy and de-cluttered -- and that's more than most sellers do. In a buyer's market, then yes, I can see that you might have to do more. But really, white sheets only and some of that other stuff is just silly to me. I do agree, though, that HGTV shows like "House Hunters" have raised buyer's expectations, at least in certain parts of the country.

And of course, you don't have to do anything at all, but if you want to sell faster and for top dollar...still, we have never had anyone but our listing agent give us advice (which usually amounted to "you're doing everything right, no need to change a thing"). We've never had a stager. I guess that's what they're paid to do, so they feel that they have to offer advice, even if you're actually doing everything (or close to it) right.

[shootingstar]

HGTV has changed the game, everyone thinks they have to have granite countertops and an "open concept main floor". The whole thing irritates me, a generation or so ago parents raised a family in a small 2-3 bedroom house with one bathroom, now everyone in the family "needs" their own bathroom.

Yea I grew up a house with 1 bathroom for 8 people. In southern Ontario.
For a private conversation, I sometimes had to sit on the bathroom floor and close the door? What does one expect of a teenager? REally no more weirder than people on cellphone in bathroom.

And yes we had 1 phone in house.

I'm beginning to sound "old". But there are still enough people who live like this in North America.

I still have lots in common with long-time non-athletic friends. However still, they try to be active themselves. I think we have inspired each other over the years.... Professionally 2 closest friends who graduate from the same faculty, same university, same year 3 of us..have taken risk to have worked for several different(5-8) employers, have moved cities for jobs and hence, haven't built up comfy pension for early retirement, from working for only 1-2 employers.

[Crankin]

Basically, in my town, it is a sellers market, with houses ending up in bidding wars, over the asking price. It is a very desirable place to live, with good schools, 2 villages with shops and restaurants, and 2 commuter rail stops. And that's not counting the history and natural beauty. We have the granite counter tops, marble shower, tile floors, and hardwood. However, this is New England, and so our house and whole neighborhood, is not the norm, with the norm being an 8 room, 4 bedroom, 2.5 bath colonial home, with a large grass lawn. We have a 10 room, 4 bedroom, 3.5 bath, 4 story contemporary home, on a hill, with no grass. This is not a house for little kids, although for me, it would have been fine. Our kitchen/eating area is extremely modern, but no "open concept," in that our family room is on a different level. Other owners of this home used our kitchen eating area for a family room, as the dining room and kitchen are kind of "open," but they also had a ton of junk downstairs, where we have our family room. We have priced it very competitively, much lower than we wanted to, on the advice of our agent. People get excited when they see a home in this town, under a certain price point. The house is priced similar to the one across the street, that just sold.
The stager is part of the package with our agent. I like this woman, but I am missing our agent we used in the past, who died. Her husband took the photo shoot and she told us to take down the pictures (some) and move a couple of chairs. Of course, my last house was the most typical one you could find, with a beautiful custom screened porch that added a lot.
I think I've decided I will either ride my bike to the farm and get my fruits and veggies for the week, or drive to the farm and the grocery store to shop, while the woman is here. Might add in a coffee stop, too. DH thinks I am focusing too much on the "what kind of person becomes a stager?" thing. My answer to this question is very judgmental, so I will let it rest.

[Aromig]

I have a friend who just sold her house in Melrose. It sold within three days of being listed, they had five or six offers all of them above asking price. They ended up accepting the offer for $50K above their asking price. Yes, I think you definitely live in a sellers market. Good luck!

[Crankin]

AHHHHH! They are here and I am going to kill someone. I was out for the first hour and half, came home, put away my groceries, then vacuumed out my car, a job I loathe. I am now sitting out on the deck. I said hello to them, but I will not engage in conversation. DH is ready to kill me. I am not going out more, because I have nothing to do, and we are going on a ride later. Basically, they moved all of the living room furniture around in a different configuration, and took our coat tree out of the entry, moved our bench/cubby for our cycling stuff (it's from Crate and Barrell, for God's sake) in an awkward spot for me to get my stuff out and put on my shoes, and now they are taking all of our art work, ceramics, etc and moving it around or putting it away. They put a copper pot on top of the dining room table, and it looks really dumb. This feels really invasive and I did let them hear me say that people are watching too much HGTV.
I think what is bothering me is the invasiveness of the process, as well as the fact that people must be really stupid if they can't envision their own stuff in a house.
ETA:
A few hours have passed. DH was really mad with me, after I looked at all of the changes they made and went nuts. Some are laughable. They put a crystal vase on top of my dresser and a top hat that DS#1 had in his closet on his dresser. They moved prints around to places that look really dumb. And I can't find my magazines that were on the coffee table in the family room, because the table is now in the living room. They took what few books we have left (we've been purging for a few years) and put them in random, awkward places, not on bookshelves. No one would live like this. Any trace of us is gone from the house, except you might get that we are cyclists. I did get DH to agree to move the bench/cubby back to where it was, as the front door could not open all of the way to where they moved it. And, who puts a dining room chair in the entry way? But, I calmed down and we went out to a kitchen/bath place and started planning the remodeling of the condo. Now drinking wine and looking forward to a long ride on the south coast of MA/RI tomorrow.

[emily_in_nc]

Woah, Crankin, did not realize that you had to submit to them moving stuff around! I assumed they would just make suggestions. Eeek, this would drive me crazy as well. I feel for you. I hope it will all result in a quick sale, but I definitely empathize with your frustration. I would feel so violated, I think.