Thanks, snapgarden!
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From Jeff's post:
Due to a failed software upgrade initiated by our hosting provider, in combination with a hardware failure in the backup system, we had to restore the forums from backup and currently have only been able to restore posts as of 1:10AM on Friday, August 31st.
We are working on retrieving additional posts, and have blocked new posts during the interim so that they don't interfere with the restore process. You can read posts, but you cannot reply or create new threads.
Thank you for your patience and please accept my apologies for the lost posts from today. We are working to restore as much as we can, as quickly as possible.
- Jeff
Thanks, snapgarden!
Thanks, all. Yep, my dad. He's gone.
He was nonresponsive when I called (I'd spoken to him the day before) - my mom put the phone to his ear and I just told him I was sorry he'd had to suffer so badly and that I wished him peace.
Had a good conversation with my sister today. I'm crying more than I thought I would - she said the same thing, and we both agreed that it's not important that we don't know why, but just to go with it and not shut the feeling down.
Speed comes from what you put behind you. - Judi Ketteler
((((Oak)))). I'm very sorry for your loss. I'm glad you're letting yourself grieve, not just for the most immediate loss, but also for all the losses you've felt in the past in your relationship with your father. I hope you find peace.
Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Continue to learn. Appreciate your friends. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is.
--Mary Anne Radmacher
(((((Oak))))). I'm sorry. It sounds like this is a tough transition. I hope you find clarity. I'm glad you have your sister to talk it through with.
Living life like there's no tomorrow.
http://gorgebikefitter.com/
2007 Look Dura Ace
2010 Custom Tonic cross with discs, SRAM
2012 Moots YBB 2 x 10 Shimano XTR
2014 Soma B-Side SS
(((Oak)))
At least I don't leave slime trails.
http://wholecog.wordpress.com/
2009 Giant Avail 3 |Specialized Jett 143
2013 Charge Filter Apex| Specialized Jett 143
1996(?) Giant Iguana 630|Specialized Riva
Saving for the next one...
Big hug Oak.
I am sorry, Oak. It's good not to question the tears. It's normal.
2015 Trek Silque SSL
Specialized Oura
2011 Guru Praemio
Specialized Oura
2017 Specialized Ariel Sport
I'm so sorry, Oak. (((Hugs)))
My experience is that it's harder and more upsetting to grieve for a complicated or unresolved relationship than a close and warm one.
Winter riding is much less about badassery and much more about bundle-uppery. - malkin
1995 Kona Cinder Cone commuterFrankenbike/Selle Italia SLR Lady Gel Flow
2008 white Nakamura Summit Custom mtb/Terry Falcon X
2000 Schwinn Fastback Comp road bike/Specialized Jett
I was just about to say exactly this. My best friend had a very awful mother. When her mother died, she had to give up that last little vestige of a dream that her mother could be a loving parent. It is such painful stuff. I am sorry, Oak. I am glad you've forged your own good life.
"My predominant feeling is one of gratitude. I have loved and been loved;I have been given much and I have given something in return...Above all, I have been a sentient being, a thinking animal, on this beautiful planet, and that in itself has been an enormous privilege and an adventure." O. Sacks
My sympathies, Oak. I had a loving relationship with my father, but somewhat complicated (he and my mom's divorce and aftermath was messy and difficult, and I had issues with his second wife while I was growing up). Losing my dad was the hardest thing I've ever had to go through. It takes time to find peace, but I wish you that in the coming months and years.
Emily
2011 Jamis Dakar XC "Toto" - Selle Italia Ldy Gel Flow
2007 Trek Pilot 5.0 WSD "Gloria" - Selle Italia Diva Gel Flow
2004 Bike Friday Petite Pocket Crusoe - Selle Italia Diva Gel Flow
Oak, I'm so sorry. I hope you find peace. I'm glad you have your sister to talk to.
dt
I am so sorry Oak, many hugs and warm thoughts headed your way. I never knew my father, and I could not have a more complicated relationship with my mother. Loss is hard enough to deal with, but even more so when the relationship is...complicated.
(((Oakleaf)))
I'm sorry Oakleaf.
'02 Eddy Merckx Fuga, Selle An Atomica
'85 Eddy Merckx Professional, Selle An Atomica
'10 Soma Double Cross DC, Selle An Atomica
Slacker on wheels.
Well folks, we made it to London in one piece! But the dog, the baby and I have some serious jet lag going on ...
2014 Bobbin Bramble / Brooks B67
2008 Rodriguez Rainier Mirage / Terry Butterfly Tri Gel
2007 Dahon Speed Pro TT / Biologic Velvet