Forget kicking he's *** with bike shoes! How about a pair of ice skates?
I had a boss who used to cause all these problems on purpose and stand back to watch what would happen. Once he grabbed my breast and went "Now what are you gonna do?" I didn't do or say anyting cause I didn't want to loose my job. God I wish I had just kicked him where the sun don't shine! Luckly we all stopped working for him and started our own company. Now he is a lonely old man. I guess there is justice out there.