What makes you happy?

[Helene2013]

NY Biker,
As I said also :

True, sometimes it is harder (when a serious illness like cancer get in your way). But for the most part, when a door closes, another one will open. Always keep all your options opened!

Change is hard. Rarely anyone like to change what seems to work for them, and even when not. The unknown and readapting is never fun. In general that is. Sometimes we are so deep into something we can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, and when we see it, it's the train ramming into us.

But nowadays, we have the tools and we should use them. I've had my share of issues when young adult. My picture was not all pink and full of glitters. I made tough decisions. Could have taken the wrong ones but I did not care. When you go through a burn out in your early adulthood and need to consult various types of specialists (and they make you swallow pills like they were M&Ms) to regain your life back but in the better, you don't see life the same way.

I had a job similar to yours (then). That woman was millionnaire and could not care less if she lost staff by the dozen. She wanted them replace like yesterday. Period. I remember seeing her hit her bodyguard! Then right after she could be rolling on the floor with her dog and having fun! Lunatic you say! But she is one of the brightess person I ever met. She did make me grow a lot, in a way as she would push you to be the best you can and offer the best service. I still carry this today. But one day I had enough and told my husband that I could not last that long. I was afraid of dropping a 13 year old job. Hard to go back with your cv in this wild world again. He told me to find a job before quitting. It would look better. I promised him to work hard at it. 2 days later...they abolished many positions and mine was in it! The best thing that ever happened to me - work wise. Sure it was scary, I had unemployment, but it is nothing compared to my regular pay, no clue how to present myself anymoreetc. But I then worked for a phone company for 10 years (before being let go again in a buy-back). But the burn out I went through in my mid-20s taught me that nothing is worth stressing about. No job, no boss, no marriage. I have people in my life that I chose to be around. They bring me good things, and in return I hope I give them good things too.

All this to say, abilities are not for everyone and you are right. Timing is sometimes to meet the right person that comes along in your life and you can make a turn for the better. But you have to be opened and willing to make a change. You have to be able to grab that opportunity and turn it in your favour. Being "strong" is not given either to all of us. And often, it is easier said then done. I know..been there!

Right now I could not have a better life, better philosophy. I have my ups and downs and own issues to go through. But nothing to prevent me from sleeping. There is a solution to every problem. Most of the time.

[shootingstar]

NY Biker,
All this to say, abilities are not for everyone and you are right. Timing is sometimes to meet the right person that comes along in your life and you can make a turn for the better. But you have to be opened and willing to make a change. You have to be able to grab that opportunity and turn it in your favour. Being "strong" is not given either to all of us. And often, it is easier said then done. I know..been there!

To be fair some people are in very difficult situations especially if they have young children and cannot /choose not to walk away from their responsibilities. And then combine that responsibility with serious depression.It's much easier as a single/child-free person to have greater latitude of choice/independent action.

So I can say, that I know what makes me happy -- being in a safe, warm home, food, loved ones, doing stuff I enjoy whenever I want after work/earning money each day and being independently mobile. This suite of benefits alone is a lot. I feel joyful to be alive and mobile but only that. AS nyc said, there are different levels of happiness at different times in life.

[Crankin]

I don't want it to sound like all my happiness comes from my DH! It's just I see so many people in unhappy relationships, and I know I am lucky. I'd rather be single than stick with an azzhole. I had an early, horrible marriage/relationship and when I got divorced, I swore I'd never let myself get in that situation again. I made some bad relationship choices between ages 17 and 24. Well, actually one really bad one at almost 18, and a few minorly bad ones at 23-24. It all worked out for the best, but sometimes I think, "What was she thinking???" I made the wrong decisions even as I knew I was making the wrong decision! I tried to convince myself I was happy all through college, but I was miserable.
This topic is quite appropriate for me today. I don't really want to discuss why, but the person on the other end of my really bad decision ended up in a hellhole situation... and is still paying for it, 43 years later. I truly am thankful and happy that my DH is around! Every single one of my close friends from AZ are divorced (ones DH committed suicide right before we left, she's been married twice since and is now happy). I was always jealous of these people a bit; they did a lot more stuff when we were young, traveled, etc. I definitely ended up in a better place than some of them.