Thread Drift

[Crankin]

I hate listening to financial stuff. I understand quite a bit of it, but I would avoid it if I could. I let DH handle this. I am aware of all of the stuff, but I don't have the inclination to watch the market daily and make transactions. I put my $ in a socially responsible fund, so I wouldn't have to deal with it. When the growth wasn't so spectacular, I gave DH permission to pull it out and do the investments himself. It's doubled, so I guess he knows what he is doing.

[OakLeaf]

Yeah, it makes my eyes glaze over too, when it isn't plain terrifying ... pretty much the same as electrical stuff. Both life skills that can wind up costing me badly if I trust too much to others. But I just don't really get it.

I wonder whether it's a matter of what we were exposed to as kids? Growing up, my parents never shared money stuff with us kids. My dad, really, my mom was in the dark too, and after he passed away, she had to learn what she could and trust entirely too much to her broker. At least, thankfully, her 401(k) gives her access to a broker who's salaried to manage all her investments without commission. And then, for most of my young adult life I lived so close to the edge that saving wasn't even possible. So, now DH tries to involve me, but his understanding is so far beyond mine that it's hard for him even to explain things in terms that I can integrate. Discrete concepts, yeah, I can get, but how it all works together, it might as well be Sumerian.



On a completely different note ... I had a little epiphany this morning about my own reactions to some things, triggered by the graffiti thread. I realized that I get cranked at any kind of "other-ing" of bad behavior.

Sometimes it's just a way to feel superior, insulting but basically harmless. ("I didn't do X when I was young, and so when I read about young people doing X now, it means that my generation was superior to the current crop of young people.")

Sometimes it's a way to deflect self-examination, to the detriment of both the person and their community at large. (The meme that racism happens only in the American South, or that intolerant Christian Americans live only in rural areas. Or that only certain genres of popular music contain violent misogynist lyrics.)

Sometimes it costs lives, and means that some truly bad people are punished much worse than others. (The idea that mass violence is terrorism only if it's committed in the name of certain religions and not others.)

From small to large, it all ticks me off, the idea that people do bad things because they're members of groups that just coincidentally the speaker doesn't belong to.

[salsabike]

On a completely different note ... I had a little epiphany this morning about my own reactions to some things, triggered by the graffiti thread. I realized that I get cranked at any kind of "other-ing" of bad behavior.

Sometimes it's just a way to feel superior, insulting but basically harmless. ("I didn't do X when I was young, and so when I read about young people doing X now, it means that my generation was superior to the current crop of young people.")

Sometimes it's a way to deflect self-examination, to the detriment of both the person and their community at large. (The meme that racism happens only in the American South, or that intolerant Christian Americans live only in rural areas. Or that only certain genres of popular music contain violent misogynist lyrics.)

Sometimes it costs lives, and means that some truly bad people are punished much worse than others. (The idea that mass violence is terrorism only if it's committed in the name of certain religions and not others.)

From small to large, it all ticks me off, the idea that people do bad things because they're members of groups that just coincidentally the speaker doesn't belong to.

Well said, Oak. Thank you for this.

[Pax]

Well said, Oak. Thank you for this.

Agreed. Been thinking about this a bunch.

[Crankin]

I did lots of bad stuff when I was young, so I rarely think in terms of "that younger generation." Plus, i think it's pretty hard to generalize a whole generation. My own kids look like angels compared to me (and my DH), and they are part of the entitled group, according to the media.
From what I've observed in my new career (and somewhat while I was teaching), "bad things" are experienced in every culture, walk of life, neighborhood. It's how the particular people deal with the "bad thing," or the community response, that is different. I always have to laugh when one of my friends says, "that happened in .....???!!" Over the years, I've set them straight, so this doesn't happen much, but I am quite sure others think the same way.

[shootingstar]

It works the reverse also, millenials having certain impressions of boomers in general. What it annoying is in work-related literature is separating employees in generational groups... and how to treat them, their perceived work habits. Or blaming the car-dominant culture on boomers for ruining the environment, schlepping the kids around (unless they are shown other options)... as if all of us fall into that single category.

The single reason why I don't give my exact age at work, is being branded for being Luddite, etc. etc. I may not have a cellphone yet...but I am a person that is coming into your dept...to convert manual processes to electronic..

[Crankin]

This is total thread drift; I really want to post this on Facebook, but don't particularly want the nasty responses.
Since when did Halloween become a real holiday? I mean, I have fond memories of dressing up in simple store bought costumes, trick or treating, and going to a party at school, run by the PTA, on Halloween night. I stopped dressing up after 6th grade. After I moved to AZ, I thought maybe it was a regional thing that adults dressed up at work and "celebrated" Halloween. Now, I see that it's not, and people are talking about Halloween weekend, like it's Thanksgiving.
I don't like scary stuff and I'm OK with this as a kid's thing, but really, it just seems silly to me. I know it's just my opinion, and it's not hurting me, but sometimes I think my idea of fun is radically different than a lot of others!

[Helene2013]

I don't care at all for Halloween. Maybe because we have no kids. And stores are already into xmas trees, etc....and we're 2 months away, and Halloween is not even over! We live in a crazy world I think....all to make you spend! hihi

[shootingstar]

I'm actually amazed how different things are in the workplace ....nowadays compared a few decades ago where adults in the workplace,not necessarily a lot, love dressing up. There's a woman in our dept. who brought a whole box of Hallowe'en decorations and went around during her lunch hr. with another colleague to decorate our cubicles.So I have lots of funky mini witch hats festooning my cubicle.

Much to my surprise, 1 of my sisters and her husband really get into Hallowe'en festivities with their 2 young children (under 6 yrs. old) ...they decorate inside and outside of their house several wks. before Hallowe'en which also includes several of their own home carved pumpkins. I was not aware of this because I live in another province. They rent a local community centre rm. and throw a largish Hallowe'en party for parent-friends and their children with games, food (+some stuff that people bring), everyone in costumes.. this is 60+ people. She corrals teen nephews and niece to help out with the party. The neighbourhood is very popular trick or treating area..300 children showed up last year at their door, in the evening for candy... The older teens who help out, find it fun.

This is completely foreign to her other family members, because we never grew up with much emphasis on Hallowe'en at all.

[lph]

Halloween is getting bigger here too, but I like it, for one because I enjoy the whole vibe of it, but also because I don't feel any pressure to celebrate. That's not completely correct, I do feel that I have to go buy candy for the kids as a minimum, but it's a nice way to meet and interact with the neighbourhood. The "holidays" I really don't like are Valentine's, and mother's and fathers day, with ads everywhere trying to give you a bad conscience if you don't show how much you love someone by buying them something.

[Pax]

Thanksgiving used to be my favorite, the whole family got together, there was great conversation and food, and there were no presents to buy... just a nice day together.

[Crankin]

Thanksgiving has always been my favorite, since it's all about the food, getting together, fun. I liked Chanukah when my kids were small, now, it's less of a celebration for us. I also used to love Valentine's Day, as my Dad always made a big deal of it while I was growing up, with jewelry for my mom, and candy/small gifts for me. DH and I go out a lot, so it's not such a big deal now. I usually cook a nice dinner and sometimes we exchange small gifts.
I also love Patriot's Day, a quintessential Massachusetts Day. It's the celebration of the "shot heard round the world," and now that I live 3 miles from where that actually happened, it's quite meaningful. I also have marched in the parade as part of a military family group, and it's just amazing.

[Pax]

This is my first "orphan" year. My parents are gone now, my brother and I are okay with each other now, but our lives are very separate so we won't see much of each as time goes on. This holiday season is going to be strange, mom was the glue that kept us together as a family, now we'll go our own ways and hopefully, create new traditions.

[Helene2013]

Pax,
I hear you on this. Very often parents are the ones who keep us together. My parents and hubby parents are gone so there is really nothing much left to "celebrate". Very often, it is just the 2 of us and we're fine with it. The hardest holiday I think is Xmas and New year's eve. Other than that, I don't care much for holidays. Thanksgiving in Canada goes unnoticed for most of us, at least those I know, in Canada. So yep. We need to be creative in our own ways.

[Pax]

I'm thankful Mary and I will get to spend xmas/new years/ and our 25th anniversary at our new place in FL. Seems like a good way to get some new traditions started!