Dear So and So

[shootingstar]

well, that's probably why I look so good in comparison. I do get a lot of good out of it. They aren't going to make me any sadder, and I still do have to process my grief.
It just keeps coming in waves.. but there is more space between the waves now.
Interestingly, i had one woman pegged as the one who really wallowed in it, and in the last month I can see that even she is improving. There are whackjobs everywhere, but i think most of the people on the grief forum are simply people who lost their spouse and are in need of a little commonality. Your mother in law, cousin, father, friends just do NOT get it. It kinda takes one to know one.

You're giving yourself time to process but you're here. where some of us grieve more privately but know that life surges ahead. We just know that it's ok to step aside and sit down quietly before continuing onward.

[Crankin]

DH told me this morning that he never told me, but that he has seen stuff on the net, written by the niece with leukemia... all stuff stating and showing what kind of luxurious house she wants (with pictures as examples) and lots of stuff about what type of hot guy she wants to marry. I guess she has absorbed her family values by age 15. I just watched a thing on Today show about the over-sexualization, etc of teens/girls and its relation to social media.
This is more upsetting to me than it should be. I consider myself to be quite progressive and I wasn't exactly the poster girl for good behavior at age 15. But, somehow, I knew money didn't solve all.

[Scrappy]

Dear Soon-to-be-X-Husband who decided to leave 4 weeks before my ACL reconstruction surgery, (which is happening this week! 10/25)

The transmission in the car went out (I told you it was going for months) and now you are stuck 1200 miles away and need a ride home? And all of your so-called friends (oh yeah, the 1 you have) won't make the drive out to get you? And the train won't allow you to board with your 4 bags of smelly, diesel soaked, work clothes? So now you call me to come get you? And then you want to drive MY jeep instead for an undetermined amount of time and put 1,000's more miles on the poor old thing until you figure out what you want to do about another vehicle? Hmmmmm....

[indysteel]

((((Scrappy)))). I assume you said no. I'm truly sorry you're going through this.

[Biciclista]

Scrappy JUST SAY NO!!!!!

[malkin]

Absolutely, say no and mean it!

[Catrin]

Scrappy - hang in there, say no and don't allow him to change your mind. It saddens me to hear you having to go through this.

[Scrappy]

Thank you for the support ladies. (((((HUGS)))) I wish I could say NO but he's essentially got me by the proverbial tail. In this case it's the financial tail. He knows I can't work or otherwise earn an income (I'm a massage therapist) for at least 6-8 weeks after the surgery, and we burned through all of my cash savings earlier this year replacing windows in the house. He's threatened to change his paycheck to another account that I have no access to and my son and I still have to survive somehow. So I'm stuck with the situation.

One thing is for sure, I am never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever getting married again.