Dear trees:
Ah. It's been nice, so you're taking it as license to do whatever foul, depraved things that you trees do. I really don't care what you do, but I must draw the line when it ends up in my nostrils, eyes, and so forth. So now I have to go on the loopy pills until May. Loopy pills are expensive. I don't want to be poor and loopy! You could have at least provided some warning.
Yours,
The person who thinks tree condoms might be a good idea.