Dear So and So

[Pax]

Dear people who stole my scooter,

You suck!

Ima gonna stick a GPS tracker in my next one so the cops can bust your $$@ if you lay your sticky fingers on it.

Have a nice day

Thieves suck! Sorry bout your scoot Reesha.

[alexis_the_tiny]

Dear world and everyone around me,

I am VERY tired of navigating social interactions this week. Please stop making me have to do that or pointing out my mistakes in socially interacting with others or trying to make me laugh at my own mistakes. Its a really sensitive point for me, I know I don't do it well or right just about all the time, CUT ME SOME SLACK.

[Biciclista]

Dear Alexis_the_tiny (I love that name) here is some slack use it liberally.

[alexis_the_tiny]

Mimi, you made me laugh, thank you. Hope you're doing well, have a nice big helping of slack if you need some of it too.

[Owlie]

Dear parents,
While it's great that you're going to come up today, couldn't you have told me when sometime before 10 this morning? I could have gotten a ride in!

(Well, okay, I couldn't have, because I was asleep, but that's not the point...)

Dear body:
We got a whole 9 hours of sleep last night! I know we've been short the whole week, but please stop wanting to crawl back into bed. We have things to do.
Oh, and left calf--please stop hurting. I don't think I actually did anything to you.

[Crankin]

Dear Men's Clothing Manufacturers,

I guess vanity sizing has now entered the men's market. I am looking for a simple, but nice birthday present for DH. I know what brands fit him, yet no store (I am so desperate that I went to the locally owned active wear store that charges twice what I would pay on line) has a size small. Now, he is not super skinny, but he is thin, and he's 5' 7". Why don't you carry size small?
His birthday is Monday and it is looking like he will be present-less.
Of course, I can't give him what he wants... not to be 55 years old!

[snapdragen]

Actually, cat food is higher in protein than dog food. So it contains more meat and is probably much, much tastier. When I have a dog over, I leave the cat's food on top of a table where the dog can't get to it...

Which is why dogs also loooooooooooooove cat poop.

[snapdragen]

Dear Men's Clothing Manufacturers,

I guess vanity sizing has now entered the men's market. I am looking for a simple, but nice birthday present for DH. I know what brands fit him, yet no store (I am so desperate that I went to the locally owned active wear store that charges twice what I would pay on line) has a size small. Now, he is not super skinny, but he is thin, and he's 5' 7". Why don't you carry size small?
His birthday is Monday and it is looking like he will be present-less.
Of course, I can't give him what he wants... not to be 55 years old!

55 is a lovely age!

snap "soon to be there too" dragen.

[OakLeaf]

Actually, cat food is higher in protein than dog food.

It's true, I never knew a dog who wouldn't eat cat food given the opportunity. But you made me think, if this is new behavior for maillotpois's aging dog, maybe he's having absorption issues and needs different food???

[NbyNW]

Which is why dogs also loooooooooooooove cat poop.

Oh! that explains A LOT.

[ultraviolet]

Dear new neighbor,

Please learn how to park your car. You shouldn't leave it hanging over into the alley, because that inconveniences everyone and increases the chances it will be hit. And you shouldn't pull it up to the very edge of the other parking area behind our building because that blocks the walkway for all of us and makes it difficult for me to pull into or out of my space without almost hitting your car. You're a PhD candidate, for crap's sake (in a field that's all about understanding and solving human problems, no less). Surely you're smart enough to figure out that what you've been doing is an annoyance for many. So, are you stupid or just inconsiderate?

On the other hand, thanks for being one more example of why I'm extremely skeptical about the intelligence and capabilities of people who have come out of that particular graduate program. I haven't hired any of you yet, and I think that trend has a strong chance of continuing.

Love,
Me.

[Blueberry]

Dear World:

Enough already. Do we really need a roof leak (that we can't afford) on top of everything else?? The economy stinks, jobs are short, we're doing everything we can, and it's still not enough. I have my doubts that anything anyone in Washington is doing or thinking about doing would help us even one little bit

Signed,

Tired and Frustrated

[Biciclista]

Dear Blueberry, I think you are right.

[Owlie]

Dear pharmacokinetics professor, AGAIN:
Either your slides are wrong, or every other source is wrong. Also, it would help if you could define variables in your presentation...

[Pax]

Dear Blueberry, I think you are right.

Yup.