Kathi, what you describe is pretty much the difference between my Kuota (48 cm men's bike, with short reach brifters and short and shallow bars) and the Guru I am getting custom. My steerer tube is cut off so much, there's like none. The bike is twitchy, which is not good for someone like me. But, it fits other than that and I am not getting rid of it. After I get the Guru, the shop is going to try and help me more with the fit of the Kuota... this has been a 5 year saga. For what I paid for it, I could have got a custom bike.
2015 Trek Silque SSL
Specialized Oura
2011 Guru Praemio
Specialized Oura
2017 Specialized Ariel Sport