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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    St. Louis, MO
    Posts
    1,058
    zoom zoom,
    I sympathize. Once someone gets under my skin, I have trouble letting it go. I have a co-worker who drives me SO crazy, that even on his good days, he asks me what's wrong.

    I'm not good at confrontations, but if I wanted to stay in the group, I'd probably say something off-handed like, "I won't critique your ride, if you don't critique mine (insert smile)." Leave her thinking. Is everyone perfect all the time?
    "Well-behaved women seldom make history." --Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

    '09 Trek WSD 2.1 with a Brooks B-68 saddle
    '11 Trek WSD Madone 5.2 with Brooks B-17

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Uncanny Valley
    Posts
    14,498
    I'm not saying this person isn't like that ... the world is full of them unfortunately. But is it possible you misinterpreted "plastic bike?" I know people who just refer to the carbon bikes in their stable as plastic, kind of in a cutesy way.
    Speed comes from what you put behind you. - Judi Ketteler

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    West MI
    Posts
    4,259
    Quote Originally Posted by OakLeaf View Post
    I'm not saying this person isn't like that ... the world is full of them unfortunately. But is it possible you misinterpreted "plastic bike?" I know people who just refer to the carbon bikes in their stable as plastic, kind of in a cutesy way.
    Perhaps...but the way she said it definitely had the air of "oh, you're one of those noobs who goes out and gets carbon right away, before you've 'earned' it." Given our rough chipsealed roads I'll recommend carbon to anyone with the budget--regardless of experience. New riders are more likely to want to ride more on a bike that doesn't vibrate them to death.
    Kirsten
    run/bike log
    zoomylicious


    '11 Cannondale SuperSix 4 Rival
    '12 Salsa Mukluk 3
    '14 Seven Mudhoney S Ti/disc/Di2

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    Canberra Australia
    Posts
    83
    Quote Originally Posted by TrekTheKaty View Post
    zoom zoom,
    I'm not good at confrontations, but if I wanted to stay in the group, I'd probably say something off-handed like, "I won't critique your ride, if you don't critique mine (insert smile)." Leave her thinking. Is everyone perfect all the time?
    Great advice there (although I have to confess that I struggle to be civil to people like the woman you have described).

    In the spirit of giving advice that I'd struggle to take myself, ask yourself the three question - will this matter in three minutes, three hours, three days?

    And walk away from her shaking your head slightly for effect.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Location
    NW Ohio...for now
    Posts
    124
    Having been in numerous situations such as this (outside the cycling arena), I have found that the best way to deal with these people is to pretend they aren't even there. Those kind of comments don't even deserve an response nor even an acknowledgment! You are there to ride! I assume you are also in search of friendship, so gravitate towards those who are there to ride, not form a pecking order. If such people don't exist in your group, maybe it's time to find some who DO want to ride and form your own group!
    Last edited by KatzPajamas; 07-23-2011 at 05:45 PM.
    Don't cross the river if you can swim the tide...

    2011-Cannondale Synapse Alloy5 WSD with 105 and BB30!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    West MI
    Posts
    4,259
    Quote Originally Posted by KatzPajamas View Post
    I assume you are also in search of friendship, so gravitate towards those who are there to ride, not form a pecking order. If such people don't exist in your group, maybe it's time to find some who DO want to ride and form your own group!
    Funny you mention that. Just this past ride there was also a new rider who I assume is about my age and very friendly. We immediately were having fun chatting with one another. I hope she keeps coming to the rides.
    Kirsten
    run/bike log
    zoomylicious


    '11 Cannondale SuperSix 4 Rival
    '12 Salsa Mukluk 3
    '14 Seven Mudhoney S Ti/disc/Di2

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    117
    Quote Originally Posted by zoom-zoom View Post
    Funny you mention that. Just this past ride there was also a new rider who I assume is about my age and very friendly. We immediately were having fun chatting with one another. I hope she keeps coming to the rides.
    My guess is that since you made her feel welcome in the group, she will ride with the group as often as she can.

    I have been very fortunate this summer to find three different riding groups that are very compatible, even thought skill levels within each group are somewhat varied. The groups have pushed me a little, and encouraged me a lot, and I have learned so much from them.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Location
    NW Ohio...for now
    Posts
    124
    Quote Originally Posted by zoom-zoom View Post
    Funny you mention that. Just this past ride there was also a new rider who I assume is about my age and very friendly. We immediately were having fun chatting with one another. I hope she keeps coming to the rides.
    If I remember correctly, zoom-zoom, you gave alot of kind words and encouragement and sound advice last spring, as I purchased my bike and struggled with the many issues that this older lady newbie ran into. This new friend you have found is very lucky to have found you to ride with! Sounds like you already have a head start on changing the tone of this group. Happy trails!
    Don't cross the river if you can swim the tide...

    2011-Cannondale Synapse Alloy5 WSD with 105 and BB30!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    pacific northwest
    Posts
    249
    Don't let anyone ruin your ride. I ride by myself most of the year and now have joined a weekly womens ride. There are some people that suck and do and say stupid things but that's life. I mostly stay away from those people and ride by the ones I like.The one time I had a real concern I spoke to the ride leader about it(a safety issue). Have fun and remember these people can be jackwagons but how you react is your choice.
    I like bikes, sometimes more than my husband

 

 

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