Quote Originally Posted by redrhodie View Post
I hope you can find the strength to ride your ride. It's pretty liberating to be able to hop on the bike whenever you want, and ride as fast as you want, with no one to tell you you're doing it wrong.

I think you have the strength and the knowledge already. I think the thing you are lacking is something else, maybe self esteem. The ability to learn to change a flat, to ride alone, to buy the bike you want without needing someone else's approval, just needs to be harnessed. You need to realize your own worth, and put that first.
+1 I'll say this very kindly, you need a break from your bf, doing so would give you a breath of fresh air to think on your own two feet. As some of the others have said, join a local group in your area and dive into biking. A new bike is lightweight to load and unload. You're stronger than you think. But you need a clear head and get out from under his thumb which is seriously dragging you down in many areas. I wish you the best. Get out there and get riding. jw