I want to replace my 25 year old bike but my bf says I should diet and lose 20 lbs?

[Roadtrip]

I grew up with manipulative men (step-father) and I have to say... Don't take it anymore. Just don't. I realize it's an easy thing for us to say. You soooooo deserve more then the treatment you are receiving. It took years for mom to realize this and she stayed with a man who was both physically and verbally abusive because he convinced she could not do better and destroyed her already shaken self confidence. She would make excuses for his behavior again and again... When we finally did leave it was a middle of the night pack up and dash so he didn't know where we went, plus for many years we had this forboding fear he would re-enter ours lives to ruin the good we had begun to rebuild.

I'm not saying your situation is like mine, but please do not take this treatment, on or off the bike.

In terms of biking... Girl, you totally freaking rock to be able to ride a 30+ lb bike 60 miles before needing to stop for lunch. I wish I were able to ride like that and I do have a newer/lighter bike! Sounds like you really need some perspective and nobody can tell you exactly what to do, only you can make that choice for yourself, but I hope the ladies here have given you some of that needed perspective.

Wishing you the best,
Shannon

[westtexas]

+1 to what everyone else said.

I just bought a new bike and mine wasn't even that old. Love the new bike. It's really boosted my confidence which has made my riding better. And the guy I am dating right now is the best cycling partner I have had - he's there as a windblock and the head of our two-man pace line and when the tire went flat he fixed it (then taught me how to do it the next day when it wasn't 9:30 p.m. and dark outside) and he's actually the one who built my new bike from scratch.

Find people who support you as you are and enjoy biking for biking's sake. My guy right now is off riding with the race team he wants to join - while I relax on the couch after our 18 mile ride this morning.

And you know, you can always get good bikes used that are in good condition and the price is reduced. Check the for sale ads here or your local craigslist. Your LBS may even help people sell their old bikes (that's what I will be doing as soon as my carbon bars come in for my new one). Get to know the folks at the shop and they will often make a good deal with you - my shop sure did on my new Synapse that I had built from the frame up.

Good luck, let us know how it goes. We are here to help and support!!