ShootingStar, I think the main thing with the thought that "poor kids" are deprived is that they are educationally deprived, or not encouraged to do well in school, for a variety of reasons. That certainly wasn't the case for you, as it was a core value in your family. And, I guess it could be debated that lack of exposure to art, music, travel makes you deprived. I had exposure to art as a kid, but music? Forget it. My dad played a lot of jazz at home, but that was it. No one played an instrument and no one traveled. My family even made fun of those who traveled . It took me a long time to get over that one. My family had the $ to do all of these things, but it just wasn't imporant to them. I didn't feel deprived, though, even though everyone else took music lessons and traveled. When one of my kids signed up for music lessons at school, I was amazed he had talent. It definitely comes from DH's side. Then, when DS #2 stated he didn't want lessons (by this time we had mooved to a community where everyone is required to take lessons in elementary school) in middle school, my friends really tried to tell me I was depriving him and I should make him. I assured him I had lived without having music lessons. And the music teacher in his elective class really did not believe him, when my son told him that he couldn't read music or play an instrument, especially since his brother was so talented. It was such a core value in the community, this was seen as odd.