Sorry I haven't responded. I didn't realize this thread was still going. I'll catch you up on what has happened.

On one of our training rides, two of us continued to ride ahead and then regroup every 10-15 minutes. This was going to be our longest ride at 50 km (30 miles). When we stopped for coffee at the 40km mark, my reluctant friend was visibly upset and not talking to either of us. I decided that this was the time to discuss it. I explained that riding was something that I was doing for health and fitness reasons (I recently finished surgery and treatments for breast cancer) and that cycling was one of the few things that alleviated my stress and anxiety. I wasn't riding ahead in order to make her feel bad, but just because riding faster made me feel good. My goal of riding the century was a personal one, which she decided to do after I had already committed to it. I also said that she would need to ride more than once a week if she hoped to complete the century in July. My other friend explained that she had a personal goal of riding the century in 7 hours and that at our current pace it would take 11 hours. This discussion upset my friend and she left the coffee shop, called her husband for a ride home and stopped talking to us.

My other friend, the peacemaker, put together a training schedule with mileage and speeds that we would try to keep to. We all discussed this and agreed to it. We are taking a little break from training as a threesome as two of us are doing a metric century on April 3. The reluctant rider is riding on her own and attempting to increase her speed and mileage so that she can better keep up. We are supposed to resume training together after the metric century.

Unfortunately, this has brought up other issues in our friendship. We had a long talk last week and I think we will be able to move forward from this. We have both agreed to communicate more clearly and let the other one know when something is hurtful or not working for us. We have agreed to disagree on the cycling. She admitted that she never really intended to complete the century and thought that we would all back out once the distances increased. Even after all of our discussions she still insisted that we must always stick together. She compared riding with her to going for a ride with our children. We wouldn't leave them behind. I told her that I would not go on a training ride with my children.

As far as the century ride. I have decided that I will do it with my husband. The century is part of the Seattle to Portland ride. I am only doing the first day of it. My husband is happy to ride with me on the first day and ride at his own pace the next. My reluctant friend has made it clear that she would expect me to stick with her throughout the century no matter what. I have visions of her stopping for 10-15 minutes every few miles and I just can't or am not willing to do that. My other friend has said that if Relucant Rider follows the training schedule she will ride with her. The schedule involves 6 days of week of riding and building to 150-175 miles per week. I guess no one really thinks that she will follow the training plan. She has bought a new road bike and is spending quite a bit of time on her trainer. I think she might surprise us and complete the ride after all. I hope she does. I will be there to celebrate with her at the finish line.

I realize that I am putting my personal fitness goals ahead of our friendship, but really, for me, completing this century has always been about regaining my strength and health. I decided to do this ride last July. I was fat, weak and sick and had to get off and push my bike up a very small incline. After almost tossing my bike over a ridge, hyperventilating and many tears, I decided that next July I would ride in the Seattle to Portland.