Dear people--

ARGH. Stop telling me that dairy/gluten/trendy food "allergen" of the week is causing my eczema. I've had it for 20 years. It's not diet-related--I can eat as much dairy/gluten/trendy "allergen" as I want and not have a problem, and I can totally abstain and have horribly red and itchy hands. It may work for you/your offspring/your cousin's best friend's college roommate, but it won't work for me. If you really want to know, it's stress-related. I'm going to go eat a bagel with cream cheese and wash it down with a big glass of milk. :P
Oh, and stop bathing your offspring in anti-bacterial soap and let the kid go play in some dirt.

Me.