I'm sorry you are dealing with this.

I agree that talking to a professional could help. Other things might also be useful.

After a serious car wreck we performed a 'cleansing ritual' on the replacement car. This is totally kookie, but also perfect in a way.

The car I totalled was less than a month old; I rolled it on a snowy road in the middle of nowhere; we could have all been killed, but we were physically (mostly) ok. Having seen me roll off the road, another driver, a doctor, stopped to render assistance, but his only comment was, "Thanks for wearing your seatbelts."

The replacement car was the same make, model and color. In the crash, one bottle of homebrew mead smashed and goldfish crackers flew all over the interior. As a blessing for the new car, we tossed goldfish over it, sprinkled it with mead, cried, said nice things to each other, and couldn't believe our luck, both good and bad.

Hokey as it may be, it really seemed to help me move past the wreck.

Try anything.
Best wishes as you move through these feelings.