I'd never felt my sit bones until I got a Brooks saddle. They're leather and you'd think they would be wicked uncomfortable, but they're not. I love mine. They sort of conform to your shape.

My hands used to fall asleep a lot on the tandem. We flipped the handlebars around to move them a touch further away and up. You can't flip your handlebars, but you might think about raising your stem.

Veronica