Any other unhappy-ending adoptive parents out there?

[Trek420]

I forgot to have children (luckily Knott remembered) so I can't speak to what it is like to raise a very young child.

All I know is that parenting is the hardest job of all, teaching would be the second hardest I think.

If you want to have a family and all the parts work, lucky you! If not I can understand the desire to have ones own child, your genetic material, your eyes, his smile ... but every time I read of some new technology, new heroic measures to combat infertility all I can think of is somewhere a kid seeing the same news thinking "now I will never have a family". Even with your quality genetic material do we ever know what you're gonna get in a child?

Surprise totally different personality type. Maybe better than you

I personally know a few families with adopted kids who are very happy as far as I know. One of my Aikido instructors adopted their daughter from China. Things are working out well. They have created a lot of community/support with other local families who adopted whether in the good ol' USA or internationally at around the same time. Lots of support.

Growing up our next door (well through the field, through the orchard and past their barn) adopted three kids. I think the kids knew they were adopted. I don't know what happened to them over time. Hey, maybe I'll look them up in Facebook but as playmates and neighbors they were fine.

In the late 70's I cooked at a cafe on Piedmont Ave Oakland, one of our cooks was adopted, sort of. As a child his parents were not interested in parenting. They had other priorities whatever those were.

So they simply dropped him off with their lesbian neighbors in the apartment building. Then they left. This would have been in the '50's. The women raised him with what legal protections they could (which at the time would be none). As far as he was concerned they are his parents.

I recall he expressed no interest in finding the couple who could not be bothered with raising him.

He was, probably still is a great guy, a fun and competent coworker, very very straight and an excellent chef ....