how much do you give to a fund?

**Brandi** · 10-25-2009, 08:00 AM

We want to condribute to our niece's memorial fund. But sence this is the first time we have ever delt with this we are not sure how much is good to give? We are not rich by any mean's but we want to help our family out. Anyone have a clue about this stuff?

**Tri Girl** · 10-25-2009, 08:31 AM

I don't know how to answer this, but to say look into your heart and give what you can give comfortably. I think no matter how large the amount, if it's given with love then nobody can ask for more. If anyone judges you for the amount- let them.

**Biciclista** · 10-25-2009, 09:30 AM

give as much as you are comfortable. A friend of mine's brother died without insurance and suddenly. They went to their church and raised quite a bit of money. if you're poor, even a token amount is nice particularly if you can get others to give too.

**nancielle** · 10-25-2009, 10:26 AM

First, sorry for the loss of your niece. It's never easy losing someone so young.

Second, I agree with the others about donating what you comfortably can. If donations have been set up to go through a bank or the funeral home, they simply notify the family that a donation has been made, most don't reveal the size of the donation. Even if that isn't how it's been set up, I don't think that anyone who has set up a memorial fund scrutinizes the amount of the donation, they're just happy/grateful that donations are being made for the cause.

Since you're a creative person perhaps you could find a creative way to add to the memorial's finances and publicize it at the same time. Maybe do a piece of your art that could be raffled off? Get the local media involved in the project to make people aware of the memorial fund and Huntington's.

Again, my condolences.

**Selkie** · 10-25-2009, 11:19 AM

Oh Brandi, I'm so sorry about your niece. In cases like this, the amount doesn't matter. It's the fact that people remembered the person (and the family) that is important.

I'll be thinking of you and am sending you a big hug.

**sfa** · 10-25-2009, 04:15 PM

I'm so very sorry to hear about your niece--what a tragic loss.

For giving to charity, I tend to be of the mindset that I want to give enough so that *I* miss the money a bit if it's a cause I really support. For friends raising money for causes they support, I might just give a token amount, but for the things closest to my heart, I give till it hurts, a little. I don't want to impoverish myself, but if it makes me plan meals differently for a while, or have to put off making some purchases I had planned, then that's the right amount for me.

Sarah

**Crankin** · 10-25-2009, 04:38 PM

I am sorry about your niece. Give whatever you want to; the recipients generally don't know how much individual givers actually give, just that they gave.

**Shara** · 10-25-2009, 04:45 PM

Like everyone said before me, there is no right or wrong amount. Give what you can and that is the perfect amount. I don't know what this particular situation is like but I think when people are asking for donations they should set up a system where people can donate anonymously so no one stands out as having given 'more' or 'less.' Giving, is giving, no matter the amount.

So sorry for your loss.

**Mr. Bloom** · 10-26-2009, 03:50 AM

I've been out of touch and didn't know! I'm so sorry!

It's not the amount, it's the thought. You provide SO much more in support and love to your family.

Hugs

**Triskeliongirl** · 10-26-2009, 05:22 AM

When I first saw this thread, I thought you were talking about Lorelei. I just read your previous post and saw that this is about another niece and that Lorelei is fine. I am sorry to hear about Emily, but I am glad to learn that Lorelei is doing well. http://forums.teamestrogen.com/showthread.php?t=34751

To answer the query in this post, donate what you feel is appropriate, balancing the financial needs of the extended family with your own. I am sure that anything you can do will be appreciated.

**Brandi** · 10-26-2009, 06:05 PM

Originally Posted by Triskeliongirl

When I first saw this thread, I thought you were talking about Lorelei. I just read your previous post and saw that this is about another niece and that Lorelei is fine. I am sorry to hear about Emily, but I am glad to learn that Lorelei is doing well. http://forums.teamestrogen.com/showthread.php?t=34751

To answer the query in this post, donate what you feel is appropriate, balancing the financial needs of the extended family with your own. I am sure that anything you can do will be appreciated.

I wouldn't be able to write about Lorelei. I am much closer to her then I was with Emily. At least at this point in her life. Emily started drifting when she was about 14 and we moved away. Does not mean i didn't love her any less or cried any less for her. But Lore is so young...I would be a mess and don't want to even think about it.
I am very glad Lorelei is doing good too!

**Brandi** · 10-26-2009, 06:07 PM

We gave till it hurt. And we hope it helps them with the expense's they had to deal with it. I feel good about it. It hurt so good....you could say.

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