I am very sorry about your loss. It's certainly a deep sadness and feeling of emptiness. My std poodle, Melony, passed about six years ago, and it was the worst loss I've gone through. My doctor saw how bad off I was and he insisted I "get over the hump" by taking antidepressants. I am not advocating that, but it really helped me; I cried nearly all the time. I'd stop at the local dog part to pet as many dogs as I could, and it also helped me. Melony's registered name (she had been a show dog before I got her) was "Love is Everywhere," and since her loss, a whole new world has opened up to me, truly with love everywhere and much more profoundly than ever before. I wish the same for you. I am now volunteering to help various animal organizations and am also grooming and visiting 10 camels every week. They are the loves of my life, and there's so much out there just waiting to be discovered for everyone.