Quote Originally Posted by KnottedYet View Post
I can't believe I didn't see this until today...

In the "Best of Craig's List", the Seattle bike wrench's list of helpful tips from the shop... a very jaundiced view of Seattleites and their bikes on the first days of sun.

Beautiful, just beautiful.

(I didn't post the link, because someone would accidentally-on-purpose click it, be offended, break out in hives, wail and gnash their teeth, and cry out at the injustice of it all. But probably not any of the Seattleites. We get it. We laugh.)
Beautiful!! One of the more quotable and family friendly bits:

"Whoo-hoo Seattle, the sun is out! Let's discuss a few things before you fumble with swapping the unused ski rack for the unused bike rack on the Subaru.

So yes, you've noticed the sun is out, and hey!- maybe it would be cool to to some bike riding. Let's keep in mind that the sun came out of all 600,000 of us, so for the most part, you're not the only one who noticed. Please remember that when you walk into my shop on a bright, sunny Saturday morning. It will save you from looking like a complete twit that huffs "Why are there so many people here?"

Are we all on the same page now about it being sunny outside? Have we all figured out that we're not the only clever people that feel sunny days are good for bike riding? Great. I want to kiss all of you on your forehead for sharing this moment with me. Put your vitamin D starved fingers in mine, and we'll move on together to some pointers that will make life easier.

SOME POINTERS FOR THE PHONE:

.......

-I really do need to see your bike to know what is wrong with it. You've already figured out that when you car makes a noise, the mechanic needs to see it. When your TV goes blank, a technician needs to see it. I can tell you, if there is one thing I've learned from you ******** squirrels, it's that "doesn't shift right" means your bike could need a slight cable adjustment, or you might just need to stop backing into it with the Subaru. Bring it in, I'll let you know for sure."

Dear? Does everyone there have a Subaru? Will I have to get one too?