Quote Originally Posted by Trek420 View Post
LPH there are even many gay cycling clubs if your friend and her gal want to ride off in the sunset together
Now, this is what I find confusing. And sorry, this may end up being long but I am really confused!!!
We are trying to give LPH some good advice - and of course some people know more than others about the topic and have more suggestions. The real good advice that several people have agreed on is "act normal". Which sounds really very reasonable to me. It's a friend who is in a new relationship, just be happy for her and be a good friend. Sounds good.
And then - a 'gay cycling club'.
What?
Why would someone need a 'gay cycling club' - or a 'gay bar' for that matter, or a 'gay restaurant', or a 'gay night club', or whatever? I mean, why can't we all meet in the same places, clubs, bars... Where is it written that some people have to gather in one place and some in another - just because of who they are in a relationship with?
What are we, segregated? Can't we all simply belong to a cycling club, period, without creating a new apartheid?

It seems like a contradiction: on one side we all tell LPH to act normal, because we are a progressive society and we treat everyone appropriately - and then on the other side it's like some groups decide to confine themselves and build their own little niche where only they can get together, and where the rest of us are not allowed.

I mean - we all scream at racism - but is this any different than creating a 'Caucasian-only restaurant', or the 'Chinese-only bar', or the 'African-American-only cycling club'? You express concerns about social class discrimination, but how is this different from having a 'CEO-only-restaurant', or a 'blue-collars-only-bar'? I just made all those up, and really hope that none of them exists - and that every club and bar and anything else welcomes everyone.
It looks like if someone wanted to build his own 'ghetto' himself - why would anyone do that? Why in the world would you want to be separated from everyone else - if your goal is to be considered as normal as everyone else, and treated as appropriately and respectfully as everyone else?

This really I do not understand.
I think that the more normal everyone is acting - the more people will stop turning their head at anything that looks different, be it color, gender, orientation... Decades ago a woman or an African-American in law school or medical school would turn heads. Thanks to the Lord - we have evolved! Likewise, decades ago a gay couple in a restaurant would have turned head - but again, thanks to God, we have evolved.

Does it mean we all approve everything? Heck no. We all have our ideas, religion, opinions. Just think about politics for one - how many of your friends have a different political affiliation than the one you have? Are you less friends because of their different opinion? I'm quite sure the answer is no. I'm a proud Republican and I'm good friend with a bunch of liberals. We have some animated discussions during the campaigns - but we are not less friends because of that. And I would feel quite weird if I was offered to belong to a 'Republican-only-cycling-club'...
We all have our agrees and disagrees in this world - but that does not mean that we have to exclude anyone from circles, clubs, groups, gatherings, businesses, etc. So why would someone decide to just exclude himself to begin with?


For the same reason I do not understand (and much less approve!) the manifestations of excess like those pride parades etc. if someone's purpose is to live a normal life without being 'discriminated' - then why does he/she act in a totally abnormal fashion? It gives the impression that the purpose is really to demonstrate aggressivity and disturb or irritate others who may have a different opinion. It's like instead of working towards unity, someone is working towards division - and it does not make any sense.
Can we all just be more spontaneous, less aggressive, and try to help each other and work together?

All this may sound naive to you - but hey, here's where I come from:
I grew up Catholic and I am still a practicing one. Well, my Pastor always says that I worship two Gods - the real God and Medicine but I'm doing my best
Anyway, when I was young I used to always go to church with my grandmother. One thing she often said is that we are all good in Church on Sunday when we listen to the sermon - but the real challenge is to get out in the real world an put it all into practice. We get out there and we meet a number of different people: those we like, those we don't like, those we agree with, those we are opposed to, and even a bunch of those we completely disapprove... Of course our first impulse would be to turn our back and walk the other way. And right there, it's where God puts us to the test: can we reach out and welcome everyone as brother and sister - no matter how different he/she is from us? Can we show respect to everyone - regardless of whether we approve or disapprove his/her choices, beliefs, actions, and lifestyle?
If the answer is no, then according to grandma we still have a lot to learn from the Bible.