Family... feh

[Grog]

I'm really sorry about what's happening to your sister, Roadie Gal. It's a tough, tough time.

But the short of it is:

Should I have just said, "You'll be fine"?

Sort of, yes.

Sometimes people ask for advice but they don't really want it. They're more like looking for a sounding board for their thoughts, and for someone to walk them through their own thought process. You and I can speak our souls to each other about this, but what your opinion is does not really matter when you're with her (again: despite the fact that she is asking you for it). She's the one who's facing the pain, the fear, and ultimately death right now. I don't think anyone can really put themselves in her shoes, even someone who's been there. It's pretty personal. You can hug her, you can comfort her, you can ask her questions about how she feels (EDITED TO ADD: without telling her how you think she feels) and everything... (ETA: I know you didn't tell her what she should do or not, but that's probably what she understood when you said what you would have done.)

She's also going to hear things that you don't say, because your voice is just one voice in her head right now. Of course I don't mean that she's hearing voices, but rather that it's very busy in there with her own thinking and also with all these other people she's talking to (doctors, other relatives, friends, other people she knew who had a similar condition and lived or died, etc.). Even if you're carefully wording things... she is pretty likely to perceive things differently than you intended them.

This is a really tough situation that I wouldn't want to be in. My brother and my father have had cancer but thankfully they're both over it. It's not a pretty place to be in for her, but it's very difficult for you too. But for the sake of her please be understanding and positive.

Good luck.