Sorry, Oakleaf. Living up to one's responsibilities is the hallmark of adulthood.

Who asked anyone to "make a firm commitment to something (you) don't really believe in"?

I'm pretty sure we've all chosen DIFFERENT ways, so there's no "one way, the only way" stuff going on here.

The point is that she isn't even willing to seriously try for a job, not that she hasn't got one. That she's made plans to duck out on her debts rather than plans to try to find some way to pay them and stick it out. In fact for every piece of advice she's been given for ways to make herself more marketable on the job market, or to conserve resources, she has a million excuses for why she can't (won't) do that, and why us asking her to is the moral equivalent of trying to force her into white slavery.

I've been on my own since I was 17 years old. This girl is 25 years old. She's not a child anymore, or shouldn't be.