I'm surprised they didn't mention "UP TALKING", which to me is the absolute biggest indicator of the lingual deterioration of young people today. It drives me absolutely insane to listen to it.
Up-talking:
"It's like when every phrase? in the middle of your sentence? ends with your voice like turning up? as though it was like the end of a question?....but it really isn't yet? and they just keep like going on and on stringing their thoughts together? so you can't like participate in the conversation? and it's so like incredibly annoying to listen to? and it like sounds like some airhead valley girl?"