Lance (well, his GF) expecting #4

[xeney]

Uh, lots of divorced dads are very good fathers. I'm not a Lance fan but I have never heard that he was a bad dad.

[Irulan]

Uh, lots of divorced dads are very good fathers. I'm not a Lance fan but I have never heard that he was a bad dad.

Serial relationships and not hanging in there when the going gets tough sets a lousy example for your kids if nothing else.

[eclectic]

Question: Does Lance split w/ them or do they split w/ him?

Lance is attracted to and has serious relationships w/ strong women (part time bimbo's excluded) Kit, Sheryl Crow and now it sounds like Anna are strong intelligent women w/ lives of their own.

I admire Lance but I don't think I would like him. He has a HUGE ego, he is driven, a perfectionist, and expects those around him to be the same,(other than the ego - don't dare up ego him) But then how else do you win that many tours?
How many women want to stay w/ a professional cyclist during their training and racing seasons? They become one of the domestiques but see their husbands/BF's less than the team does and they are at home holding everything together.

The latest book on Lance that I read (can't remember the name - it was written by a reporter who lived around them during the training for one of Lance's tours) stated that just about all the great cyclists throughout time are dealing w/ black issues from their past - Lance is no different.

What I think would be hard is for another woman to have to put up w/ Lance's mom and their relationship ! How many times has she been married? ? ? ?

I wish Anna and Lance the best of luck and that they, the baby, Lance's other children can all find a balance - especially while he is training for and competing in another TDF.

I wouldn't want that life.

[Irulan]

Does any of that matter? We all have baggage, every single one of us. I mean, so what if you are a tour winner, or anything else? My personal belief, which to some people sounds like a fairy tale but it isn't, is that once you bring kids into the world, that an intact family should be the#1 priority. It doesn't matter how big your ego is, or how damaged you are, or what else you have to do in life.

I just don't buy the "oh black issues" stuff. It's excuses. You want to hear about my issues?

It reminds me of a party I was at once. A girl was stumbling, barfing drunk and people are like oh, poor thing - her parents are divorced, she had to give up a baby blah blah blah..... Me? My comment was, so what. ( you want to hear about my life?) Lots of people have really big problems, and manage to get help, or learn to make other choices. No one is forcing these people to listen to their demons. Ok, so so I am digressing a bit, but egos, demons, black baggage... it's all the same the big question to me : are you man enough to sack up and deal with it? Put some balance in your life? Fix the problems? Unload your baggage?

Oops, sorry for the rant on Xmas morning.

[Pax]

There is no such thing as comparative pain, each person experiences theirs at their own pace. For those who got past theirs then I offer you heartfelt congratulations. For those still suffering I offer my condolences.

[eclectic]

Does any of that matter? We all have baggage, every single one of us. I mean, so what if you are a tour winner, or anything else? My personal belief, which to some people sounds like a fairy tale but it isn't, is that once you bring kids into the world, that an intact family should be the#1 priority. It doesn't matter how big your ego is, or how damaged you are, or what else you have to do in life.

I just don't buy the "oh black issues" stuff. It's excuses. You want to hear about my issues?

Oops, sorry for the rant on Xmas morning.

I wasn't trying to make excuses for him - I was just making an observation based on everything I had read about him to back up my statement of who is leaving who. I believe it is the women leaving Lance - not the other way around.

Also I just found it interesting about the statement that all the great cyclists had demons in their background, again not making excuses, just an observation, with a question of "is this why they have that extra edge that makes them a winner?" (now please don't get off on a doping rant - that is not what this is refering to)

In conclusion: I agree, in a perfect world all children would have parents who love, cherish them and each other and act as excellent role models at all times, putting the needs of the children first . . . but alas this world is not perfect.

But by the grace of God, we have Christmas.

Merry Christmas all

[bmccasland]

I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm perfect. No, just get AWAY from that closet door. NO, do not go near the closet door!! Those are not bones rattling, you don't hear a thing. Trust me on this...

I think my closet is the size of the wardrobe in the Chronicles of Narnia.

[Crankin]

I don't know what to think. I admire Lance and from what I've read, he is a good dad to his other kids.
I've been around enough racers, both amateur and pro to know that it is not a life I would want. My exchange student, who has been a pro for the last 3 years is sick of it. He can't find a team because they are all folding and he is enjoying being "normal" for a change. Both he and my son were totally driven about riding, but eventually, it got to them. So, I say live and let live.

[Mr. Bloom]

I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm perfect.

Beth, I believe you, but I think this is a topic for another thread

Frankly, I'd rather have my heroes and role models modeling postive things, such as intact families. And if you are in the public eye, people will see and comment on what you choose.

I agree and disagree...I agree in the sense that I was disappointed when he started hanging out with that Olsen twin! When middle aged men date 21 yr old women - in many cases - it's evidence of extreme male insecurity and is not a positive role model (...and this has been discussed before and I agree that this is a generalization and not an absolute as some of you have proven in your own relationships)

But, on the other hand, I'm not sure what is normal anymore. Am I allowed to judge that exclusively...as conservative as I am, I think not.

I'm a literal b@stard - born to an unwed teenager and adopted at 4 days of age. A century ago, I would have been doomed...but today, I'm successful by most standards...and I'm considered normal (notwithstanding the fact that I hang out here).

Children in non-traditional situations are just as likely to thrive when it's the only life they know...they don't need to adjust - they simply live the life they know...as long as no one undermines their self perception by telling them they're in a bad situation. I always knew I was adopted...but I was always told that this made me special - So, I never associated it with being a b@stard child. Contrary to this, I have adopted friends that didn't know and the revelation for them was traumatizing.

JMHO

I'm truly fascinated by the open discussion on this issue and the genuine and divergent opinions being expressed.