Roadside memorials-better driving

[carpaltunnel]

No one wants to be forgotten, but eventually we all are.

Good point. I see roadside memorials around town that appear to be renewed year after year by someone.

I also see decals in the back windows of cars driven by teens, in this format..."In loving memory of X 19xx-19xx" Some auto detailing shop is making money off those kids.

[Zen]

I also see decals in the back windows of cars driven by teens, in this format..."In loving memory of X 19xx-19xx" Some auto detailing shop is making money off those kids.

Those are decals (DIY) and I find them strange.
I wouldn't mind the memorials so much if they were tasteful and simple (many are) but too often there are mylar balloons and other knick-knacks involved.

[carpaltunnel]

find them strange

I agree. I'm certainly no expert, but I wonder if those things short circuit the healing process, and teach people to practice grieving. I'm thinking of a man who worked for my father. I knew him all my life, as he was also a shirt-tail relative. He lost his wife young and was so sad, but spent the rest of his life alone and grieving, and everyone (Family and small town) just kind of helped him stay in that role. I'm probably not expressing this very well, but do you know what I mean?

[badger]

I've also heard that memorials tend to distract drivers and may pose a risk for them to get in accidents themselves.

[bmccasland]

Yeah, but I had trouble driving past one on the Beeline highway for a DPS officer I used to work with who was killed in the line of duty. (The "beeline" is a particular highway in AZ that's the escape route for people from Phoenix to get to the cool mountains.) For a while I wouldn't even drive that road.

[Aggie_Ama]

I put very little thought into them myself. In Texas there are small white crosses for a death. Usually they are not very flashy but sometimes they do become tacky grounds for litter that was once part of the memorial. I tend to agree they often become eyesores.

My own mother has a view of graves, she has never been to her father's grave except to show me once and he died in 1982. She says "I said everything to him in life that needed to be said and miss him terribly but I have nothing to say to a stone. No regrets, no need to see him, he isn't there to me." She feels cemetaries are weird and constant visiting just born from regret. I am not criticizing anyone who does but I agree with her. I have been to the graves of some of the closest people I have lost graves once after the funerals. Honestly I felt nothing, not sad, not reflective so I guess I don't get memorials either.

I want to be cremated because I watched graves being moved to make a new highway. At least if you aren't buried you cannot be disturbed.