Difficult work conversations: a gender perspective

[wackyjacky1]

I try to keep in mind that work is work; it's business, it's not personal. When things get frustrating, I remind myself of that, and that helps me keep my emotions under control. I have never cried at work, but that's not to say I haven't gone home afterwards and bawled my eyes out!

I have a co-worker who cries at everything. She simply can not handle even the most well-intentioned constructive criticism, however nicely it's put to her. I have even seen her do the hand-to-the-forehead-and-collapse-to-the-floor-in-distress routine. The rest of us literally step over or around her as we go about our jobs -- we don't even notice it anymore!

[bmccasland]

I used to be much more emotional, and didn't take criticism very well. It's hard to not take it very personal. Then Katrina hit. Work stuff doesn't bother me very much anymore. The only time I had trouble was the judges score I received on a re-creation of a 16th century fashion doll. THAT I put my heart and soul into, and their "Wow!" but..." remarks were a bit difficult to handle. (in case you're wondering, here's the doll http://home.earthlink.net/~bmccasland/index.html )

So I don't recommend being scared out of your life, watching everything you knew as *normal* turn totally upside down, knowing that life will never be the same again, as a way to learn to not take things so personal. But it does give one perspective

However, if work or significant other has little more to say but put-downs. "You're nothing without me." It's time to change horizons. Or let them move on without you. And don't let the door hit them out the way out....