First, I'm glad you went with women's bars and that they have done a lot to help with your reach problems. That's what I was going to recommend when I started reading your post. That worked for me with my bike, and I don't have to use shims.

As for the shims and all, if the normal ones are still not enough, have you tried looking into short reach levers? Are you running Shimano? What level? Newer Ultegra or DA shifters have a shorter reach than older models. Then there are the odler style, like these Ultegra ones that can be fitted with 2 thicknesses of shims: http://www.awcycles.co.uk/brands/Shi...617/index.aspx

Finally, if you're running Shimano, have you considered moving to Campy? A lot of people prefer shape of the hoods and the reach of Campy levers to Shimano. That's of course a potentially pricey change, but if it helps you get out and ride your bike...