Dear So and So

[lph]

aaah - and that's so unfair that women with wrinkles "look old", while men with wrinkles look "dignified" or "patrician" or "have character".

I've seen my mother age. I've resigned to getting lots of wrinkles, all over. (I'm just going to be a bit more careful in the sun than she's been.) And now that I've seen women my age overdo it the Botox and lose all facial mimicry I truly don't want an unwrinkled face anymore.

[cyclinnewbie]

Dear Lord,
If you won't make me skinny, would you please make my friends fat?



Dear 20-something male driver,
Could you please not drive 3 inches away from my bumper as we're hurtling at 65mph down the freeway? I have my babies in the car, and would like for them to reach adulthood. You, I don't care so much about...if you want to risk your life like that, leave me and my family out of it.


Dear the guy in the white truck on the road two nights ago,
Next time you want to drive drunk (yes I saw you driving as if you were playing pinball...hit the center line, drift and hit the fog line, drift and hit the center line, drift and hit the fog line...and yes I was the one you cut off as you swung out into traffic as you left the bar), see the above message. I don't care so much about your safety, but how dare you put MINE in jeopardy!! LOSER!

[cyclinnewbie]

Dear mother in law,
Would you please JUST BE NICE????? Just once in your life? Can't you see that your darling baby boy and I have been married for almost 20 years and and HE'S HAPPY!!! Why don't you keep your judgemental b*lls^%@ to yourself you jealous meanspirited hateful spiteful miserable creature. If I want your opinion I'll ask for it. Otherwise shut it.





OMG that felt GOOD. Really really good.

[boy in a kilt]

aaah - and that's so unfair that women with wrinkles "look old", while men with wrinkles look "dignified" or "patrician" or "have character".

But then there is the whole hair issue. Men's hair migrates as they age. I no long have any hair on my calves and the bald spot is getting just a little bigger as I age. I'm basically ok with that.

However, whyinthehell did it have to move to my shoulders, back, ears and nose? Not just the nostril hair but hair growing on the outside of my nose. My arm hair now goes half way up the back of my hand.

[IFjane]

But then there is the whole hair issue. Men's hair migrates as they age. I no long have any hair on my calves... I'm basically ok with that.

I'd love it if the hair on the front of my legs would disappear as well...

Oh yeah, and that pesky mustache that I seem to have developed & have to keep bleaching.....

[7rider]

Oh yeah, and that pesky mustache that I seem to have developed & have to keep bleaching.....

What about those stupid chin hairs????
What's up with that?????

[Zen]

You guys are scaring me

[boy in a kilt]

I'd love it if the hair on the front of my legs would disappear as well...

Oh yeah, and that pesky mustache that I seem to have developed & have to keep bleaching.....

I wouldn't mind it if ALL the hair on my legs (or calves at least) would disappear. But no. It's just the outside of my calves and the shins.

And then there is the rest of the Darwin sweater...

[OakLeaf]

Who was it that used to do the comedy routine about zits migrating as we age? They retire and move South to a place where there's a full moon and a nice breeze...

[crazycanuck]

Dear Passport,

thank you for showing yourself..YAY!!!

now if i can just figure out if my passport is valid in the US with all the new passport regulations..I think so..

[KnottedYet]

Oh yeah, and that pesky mustache that I seem to have developed & have to keep bleaching.....

I shave mine every couple days. In the shower. With the same razor I use on my armpits and legs.

Ooooh, having some fun now...

[dex]

Dear body,

How did you get so sick so fast? Do you think you could see your way to getting better that quickly, too? Because, you know, I like to breathe without pain.

Thanks,
Me.

[sgtiger]

Dear Lady,

Thank-you for the many blessings that you have bestowed upon me and my family. A special thank-you for your most recent one. I shall honor you by sharing your gifts.

[Andrea]

Dear oil company,

Screw you, I'm riding my bike

[Flybye]

Men's hair migrates as they age.

I did not realize that it was a migration issue for men. Thanks for the laugh!