Getting over fear after getting hit

[PscyclePath]

To second what Oakleaf and Techno-Tart mentioned, going to one of the League Road I courses might be a good start; since Road I basically covers traffic skills and defensive cycling.

One thing that we do here locally to ease folks into urban cycling are the "Critical Manners" rides once a month, where we get together and do a ride under supervision (LCIs at the front and back of the group) in early evening downtown traffic, stopping along the way at a local restaurant for supper or snacks, then looping back to the starting point.

I used to be deathly scared of heights. I got it literally beaten out of me in ROTC and the officer training classes, where they made me not only climb up all that stuff, but then jump off of them when I got to the top. I can't speak to the gentleness of the method, but it certainly worked by making you face and ultimately overcome your fears.

Tom

[Spec&TrekGirl]

Thanks for all the encouragement and advice! I followed the link to bikeleague and the Road I course looks like an excellent idea - for both of us hopefully. I know I wasn't exactly a defensive or safe rider back in my teens/twenties. I wasn't aware that there were classes like this available.

I'm not sure how I came across this forum, I think its really great, especially for those of us not involved in a local group of riders. Thanks for all the welcoming comments!

Took my first 20 mile ride yesterday and can't wait to get back on the bike! Even though its only supposed to be in the 30's I might have to take another ride today.

I'm really hoping I can get him to try a road bike again even if we stick to the bike trails as they are plentiful around here. It's just so fun!

[NbyNW]

I just want to chime in with others that counseling might be helpful for your DH, as well as the two of you together, to help you communicate with each other about your feelings on this issue.

To illustrate, a brief background on my own experience with injury, recovery, and fear of "getting back on the horse."

I got seriously hurt about 18 months ago while working on a design-build in a foreign country. A large gate fell on me and my sacrum was fractured. I had to be flown home, couldn't put any weight on my right side for six weeks, and went through months of PT.

Immediately after my accident, I was on an emotional high; I was just happy to be alive, happy the doctors were telling me that they didn't expect me to have any permanent damage. (I'm still walking with a limp)

About six months out, when I began to get back into my normal routine, I started to have nightmares about my accident, and about any other kind of accident my brain could imagine while I was asleep. I became depressed. I live in Seattle and when I visited the new Olympic Sculpture Park some of the art pieces caused me to have anxiety attacks. I would be afraid to cross the street in some places, because in Seattle we have some intersections that have no stop signs and no traffic lights, although drivers are supposed to yield to pedestrians.

I felt really embarrassed and ashamed of my fears, but I knew I couldn't continue to function that way, so I found a counselor who specialized in PTSD and injury recovery and it was tremendously helpful. Some joint sessions with my DH have also been really helpful, since we were not in sync in terms of how I felt about my injury and what he went through when I got injured. It took me a while to convince DH to do the joint sessions, though. He's now glad we did.

Riding my bike actually feels more natural to me than walking, but since I am also worried about the dangers of riding in traffic, I'm planning to take some of those safety classes that I've seen others mentioned in this thread.

It sounds like your DH went through a hard time with his injuries and doesn't want to see the same happen to you or your children. The safety classes might help address that, but if his brain is hard-wired to expect the worst, I'd really recommend getting some outside-third-party objective help.

Injuries should not stop you from enjoying the things you love. You learn that fire is hot by getting too close, right? But it's still beautiful, and great for roasting marshmallows.

-Jocelyn

[OakLeaf]

DH got a new road bike which I should be really excited about, except that at 53 he still rides like a 9-year-old boy. On and off sidewalks, in and out of traffic

I totally can't get him to understand how much it scares me. I think he would take a safety course, since we both take the motorcycle safety course to brush up at regular intervals. Unfortunately it looks like the Road I course is only offered one weekend all year in our area and he's got prior commitments. I'd like to take it myself with a local instructor - Florida definitely has some BIZARRE traffic situations that I don't really have my head around.

[PscyclePath]

DH got a new road bike which I should be really excited about, except that at 53 he still rides like a 9-year-old boy. On and off sidewalks, in and out of traffic

I totally can't get him to understand how much it scares me. I think he would take a safety course, since we both take the motorcycle safety course to brush up at regular intervals. Unfortunately it looks like the Road I course is only offered one weekend all year in our area and he's got prior commitments. I'd like to take it myself with a local instructor - Florida definitely has some BIZARRE traffic situations that I don't really have my head around.

Oakleaf:

What town do you live in? There's sort of a backchannel listserver for the LCI community; maybe I can fish around and find somebody who's willing to put one on for you. Otherwise, the classes sort of get scheduled when somebody feels like it...

Getting LCIs out into the far corners of various states to do classes has been a running topic for the past couple of days anyway...

Tom