Karen, I wouldn't recommend changes to your bike fit without seeing you and your bike. While a shorter and/or higher stem might be appropriate, I would recommend having a bike fit before making that decision. A shorter/higher stem can also have a negative impact on your bike handling (especially descending) since it moves weight off the front of the bike.
My sense is that your discomfort is from riding in a new position. And, as anyone who rides a road bike knows, this position puts your body in a very static position that's not completely natural and doesn't silmulate much else that we do in life. Because of this, it takes time to build strength (core, along with arms, hands, shoulders, neck, etc) and to become comfortable.
Are you descending in your drops? You should be. Really try to focus on keeping your elbows soft/bent and your shoulders relaxed/down. Write yourself a little note for your stem if that will help you remember.
What type of brake levers do you have? Can you place at least one knuckle of your first two fingers around the lever while you're in the drops? If not, you might want to consider having the levers shimmed. This will bring them closer to you and make it easier to depress them.
I personally keep my brakes adjusted very soupy (ie soft). I can depress my brakes almost all the way to the bar before they fully activate. I recently switched to a new mechanic and he adjusted my brakes very tight/responsive! I hated it and it made my hands hurt!
Eventually, you want to strive to ride in the drops on your descents while spending less time touching the brakes. This will take time -- be patient -- however, once you can do this you can move your hands to a lower position on the drops which will be more comfortable for you.
You will build strength as you ride your bike. Try to stay relaxed and you'll have less discomfort.
It sounds like you don't like the switchbacky descents even though you're comfortable with the fast straight descents. That's natural for a newer rider. I recommend learning how to counter-steer (it's a cornering skill and it's been discussed at length elsewhere on the forum). You should use counter-steering to be stable on switchbacky descents.



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