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  1. #31
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    555

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    bcipam,

    I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through right now. My thoughts are with you and your family.

    I've been through a similar situation. Please remember he couldn't escape the demons inside and he is now free. I hope your nephew can eventually let the hate go and learn to accept that there is no one to blame for this sad loss.

  2. #32
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Asheville, NC
    Posts
    680
    Just wanted to send some virtual support...wishing you and your family strength in this difficult time!

    ...and yes, try to see something beautiful everyday, just a little something to lift a bit of spirit!
    I am a nobody; nobody is perfect, and therefore I am perfect.

  3. #33
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Wisconsin
    Posts
    1,139
    Quote Originally Posted by Pedal Wench View Post
    This touches home with me. Please comfort your sister and make sure she knows that she did the right thing in getting out and getting the one child out of that situation. I was married to an alcoholic and firmly believe that I saved my own life the day I walked out. I tried to save both of us, but when that didn't work, I had to save myself. The son will come to realize this in time.

    L-
    I second Pedal Wench. Pam, I know you don't believe this right now, but no one can force an alcoholic to get help. They have to want to do it on their own. I had the courts force my ex into treatment. He was a nice guy to me for about a month and went back to his old habits. One thing I would highly recommend for everyone is Al-Anon and Ala-Teen. It's free and there are chapters and meetings literally everywhere. Get the family to a meeting. Just sit there and listen at the first meeting and go with your instinct after that. It was by far the best gift I gave myself to heal.

    ((hugs and prayers)). This too shall pass even though the burden is heavy. Trust in the Lord Pam and he'll see you through it.

    God Bless,
    Dar
    _____________________________________________
    “Minds are like parachutes...they only function when they are open. - Thomas Dewar"

  4. #34
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Reporting from Moonshine Mountain
    Posts
    1,327
    Pam you and your family are in my thoughts. The TE family will be here sending you good thoughts and strength to deal with this. Hang in there and don't forget to get help not only for your family but for yourself, too.
    "When I'm on my bike I forget about things like age. I just have fun." Kathy Sessler

    2006 Independent Fabrication Custom Ti Crown Jewel (Road, though she has been known to go just about anywhere)/Specialized Jett

  5. #35
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Looking at all the love there that's sleeping
    Posts
    4,171
    I'm sorry to hear about this, Pam.
    This is an awful lot for everyone to go through and I wish you all strength and healing.
    2007 Seven ID8 - Bontrager InForm
    2003 Klein Palomino - Terry Firefly (?)
    2010 Seven Cafe Racer - Bontrager InForm
    2008 Cervelo P2C - Adamo Prologue Saddle

  6. #36
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Charlotte, NC
    Posts
    508
    Wishing you strength and wisdom to help your sister and her family.
    .......__o
    .......\<,
    ....( )/ ( )...

  7. #37
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    3,867
    >>All of you with faith, please pray for me and my family and especially my nephew who now has so much hate and hurt inside. I know time is a healer but boy, there's alot of healing to do.<<

    It's only natural for family members to be angry when their loved one commits suicide. I hope your nephew is able to focus the anger where it belongs, on his father, instead of pushing away his mother. They are going to need each other. She couldn't have done anything to stop him from committing suicide, and he would have done it anyway.

    I'm sorry for your family's loss, Pam.

    Karen

  8. #38
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    2,824
    Pam,
    I am so very sorry. You and your family are in my prayers.
    Jennifer

    “Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.”
    -Mahatma Gandhi

    "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit."
    -Aristotle

  9. #39
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    Downunder
    Posts
    292

    so sorry bcipam

    thinking of you and hoping you all get the support you need.

    it's hard... it's a year ago today my father-in-law suicided. It's true what bikerchic68 said "When someone decides, truly decides that they're done, and they're going to commit suicide, there is NOTHING anyone can do to stop them"... i keep reminding DH, brother-in-law and gorgeous sister-in-law of this.

    Keep reminding your sister and her children. They will need to hear it.

    again, i am so sorry to hear this


    {{{bcipam}}}
    To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived — This is to have succeeded - Emerson

  10. #40
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Alaska
    Posts
    2,201
    i am so sorry to hear of this happening to you.

    sending you extra strength to get through this hard time.
    "Forget past mistakes. Forget failures. Forget everything except what you're going to do now and do it." – William C. Durant

    I click here to help detect breast cancer.

    I click here to help feed animals in need.


    I play this game to help feed people in need.

  11. #41
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Vancouver, BC
    Posts
    3,932
    Good luck Pam. You're a very strong woman... I hope your sister and her kids have half your strength.

    Big hug.

  12. #42
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Washington State
    Posts
    236
    (((((((BCIPam))))))))

    I just lost my brother to suicide 2 1/2 months ago and can empathize with what you are going through. I have had so much support from the women on this site and have looked into many of the websites that some were kind enough to post about.

    Although it is still very fresh and raw for me, if I can do anything at all, or if you'd like to get in touch with me...please do. It isn't an easy process.

    Take care of yourself.
    Vertically challenged, but expanding my horizons.

  13. #43
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    washington state, sigh
    Posts
    126

    Warning Religious content

    Lord, there is a family whom you know. A family separated by pain. A child of yours has removed himself from this world without your permission, Lord. We pray for this family and all of there friends, that they not be overwhelmed with guilt and pain. Allow this family to griev and heal, Father. Do not let guilt and blame burn such a whole inside these children that they cannot see who loves them, Lord. Lord you know the needs of this family, I ask that you care for this family in there time of need. In Jesus name, Amen

  14. #44
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Indianapolis, IN
    Posts
    739
    I'm so sorry for your pain.
    Don't think of it as getting hot flashes. Think of it as your inner child playing with matches

  15. #45
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Middle Earth
    Posts
    3,997
    Oh BC
    My thoughts remain with you - I include you every time I light a candle and send out healing, love and protection for those I know who may use it.
    Hugs

 

 

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