DH Health Issues... How do you cope?

[LBTC]

Thanks for the tip, Wahine! I'll remember that for my own test, too.

Hugs and butterflies,
~T~

[salsabike]

Just put a really good book in the bathroom during the prep. Test itself is no big deal.

[rocknrollgirl]

I had both ends scoped in November. As everyone has said, the test is easy. The prep HORRIBLE!!!!! I did the broth and as much electrolyte drink as I could get down, and then lots of food after!

Please let us know how your husband makes out. I will throw some good karma your way.


Ruth

[Haudlady]

GRRR! This is driving me crazy... they still haven't scheduled the test. I guess they are busy - but I want a date. DH isn't pushy... so it's looking like I'll have to be!

I'll warn DH about the prep - and he will be happy to hear that the test itself is 'easy.' I'll have to go shopping for some expensive TP; thanks for the warning!

DH and I did have a nice weekend. We made a special dinner together last night (African sweet potato peanut stew), and Saturday night was his work holiday party (they do it very late so that it won't conflict with other holiday plans - and so people are more relaxed). It was nice - I even got him to dance with me! It's usually like pulling teeth, and I didn't even have to ask twice.

I'm going to call his doctor's office right now. I know they won't tell me anything (for privacy reasons), but maybe I can get them to check on why the referral office hasn't called yet to set the appointment.

[Pax]

...I'm going to call his doctor's office right now. I know they won't tell me anything (for privacy reasons), but maybe I can get them to check on why the referral office hasn't called yet to set the appointment.

Morning Haudlady, just a thought...ask your DH if he would mind signing a Release of Information for you with his healthcare provider so they will talk to you freely. He can be as specific as he wants to be about what they can tell you and he can make the duration of the release for any length of time (usually no more than a year).

[Duck on Wheels]

I've also been scoped every which way. Gastroscopy (tube down the throat) is, to me, sheer torture. Colonoscopy prob'ly would've hurt too, but they offer a decent anesthetic as a matter of routine here, whereas for gastroscopy they need your cooperation so you only get the anesthetics you seem to need as the procedure proceeds. Anyways ... what with the sedative they put me on, colonoscopy was pretty much painless and kind of fascinating, unless I was in serious pain before they started. The first time or two they even let me look in a "student scope" that kinda branches off the main scope so that two eyes can see the same view. The doctor attached the student scope when he was done taking his biopsies, then he explained where and what we were seeing as he slowly withdrew the scope. Fascinating! Not often you get to look deep into your own insides.

Oh, about time expectations: Because of the anesthetic, I had to doze on a recovery gurney for a couple of hours after before they would let me leave. Accompanying partners were allowed in then and the doctor came by towards the end to review the information when the patient is fully alert. At least, that's how it's handled here at my local hospital.

[Haudlady]

ask your DH if he would mind signing a Release of Information for you with his healthcare provider so they will talk to you freely.

Good point, Queen... it's especially complicated because DH works in a 'cube farm,' and doesn't want to talk about symptoms at work! I asked them about that when I called, and DH has to go into the clinic to the records department. We're going to do that soon!

Okay. Just as well I called the clinic this morning... DH went in for his original appointment on Wednesday... I told them at the clinic that I know they can't talk to me, but asked if someone could check through and see why no one has called yet to set the appointment for the colonoscopy... she looked, and looked, and kept asking me questions... I finally said "you are showing the order for this, right?" Um, NO!!! It's not in the notes that he needs it! Now I'm really glad I called. She's going to check back with the doctor - the doctor was VERY clear with DH that this was necessary. Apparently he wasn't clear with anyone else.

Why you have to be proactive... My goodness.

[Aggie_Ama]

You may see if you husband can authorize you on his behalf. It is easier for me to call my husband's doctors, so I am authorized. I have had some conversations that far cross the TMI line. Oops- just saw Queen suggested that.

For the colonoscopy prep, I got my husband UNSCENTED baby wipes. His hiney will be thankful.

[bcipam]

I had blood with my stool for almost 6 months before seeing a doctor. I can understand what your husband is going through and why he waited. The whole stool, poop, colon thing is so embarassing and no one wants to talk about it.

Of course I had colon cancer (previously documented under health issues) but I finally got it taken care of. I made more of the problem than it was. Now I can talk freely about poop with all my friends and have them talking about it as well. Really not something we should be embarrassed about - it's a basic bodily function and we all do it.

Anyway - just make sure he gets his colonscopy. It's really not that bad (the prep is the worse part - the scope is nothing - really nothing. You get an IV pain med and anesthesia and most people are out. I was awake and watched the scope but felt nothing). If it is colon cancer, then deal with it immediately. No sense waiting. It's easily treated and has a very high success rate especially if caught early. The prep (which I went through a total of 4 times for various reasons) isn't that bad. I suggest going on liquids the day before prep and on prep day, need to stay home. I took my Phosphersoda and within 1/2 hour, had the first urge. It wasn't crazy like being sick it was more like I had to pee. The urge continued on and off for most of the day so you have to stay home. Warm broth is nice to take during. I could only do so much jello. You can also have popicles.

I'll be praying for your husband and that you have the strength to make sure he gets all his tests done. Take care.

[Haudlady]

I called the clinic this morning... DH went in for his original appointment on Wednesday... asked if someone could check through and see why no one has called yet to set the appointment for the colonoscopy... she looked, and looked, and kept asking me questions... I finally said "you are showing the order for this, right?" Um, NO!!! It's not in the notes that he needs it!

DH got a call this afternoon (I think that old saying is correct - about the squeaky wheel!). He has an appointment for a consultation on February 12th. So - I won't have any news until after that point. And, I am assuming that since it is only a consultation we won't have the procedure date for a little bit after that.

I know it's 'only' two weeks away... but it seems like a long time to wait!

Patience is a virtue.

[LBTC]

Haudlady, I'm so glad that he's got a date for the consult. Hopefully where you are the wait for the scope is not as long as here. I probably had a longer wait because I'm having both scopes done at the same session. I booked mine at the end of November, and will have them Feb 28. I'm really appreciating all the tips about the prep here, too.

The next two weeks will alternately crawl and fly by. Keep your spirits up, keep talking and hugging, and keep doing the things you always do. You'll be surprised when the day is here and you think back to how today seems like it was just yesterday.

Let us know how it goes.

Hugs and butterflies,
~T~

[Dogmama]

My DH had symptoms for a year that he ignored. I don't want to go into details because everybody's case is different. Just suffice to say that it was hell.

Here is how I coped:

1. Live one day at a time.
2. If you're going to make up scenarios, make up good ones. Why torture yourself?
3. Be proactive!!! If he needs further treatment, be there. Listen to what the doctors and nurses are saying. Ask questions. Write it down. You will need to be his advocate because stress makes people stupid. Be pushy. The medical community is overworked and mistakes are made.
4. Be extra good to yourself. Cycling is a great way to relieve stress.
5. Find somebody you can talk to about your "bad" feelings. Just airing them automatically cuts the power in half.

Be sure to keep us posted. Take good care.

[Haudlady]

My DH had symptoms for a year that he ignored. I don't want to go into details because everybody's case is different. Just suffice to say that it was hell.

Here is how I coped:

1. Live one day at a time.
2. If you're going to make up scenarios, make up good ones. Why torture yourself?
3. Be proactive!!! If he needs further treatment, be there. Listen to what the doctors and nurses are saying. Ask questions. Write it down. You will need to be his advocate because stress makes people stupid. Be pushy. The medical community is overworked and mistakes are made.
4. Be extra good to yourself. Cycling is a great way to relieve stress.
5. Find somebody you can talk to about your "bad" feelings. Just airing them automatically cuts the power in half.

Be sure to keep us posted. Take good care.

Thank you, Dogmama! VERY good advice...

#2... I was hugging him last night, and found myself imagining him all happy and healthy inside (it seems a bit silly, maybe, but it can't hurt... and it might even help).

#3... Good idea to write it down! I'll bring a notebook to the appointment on the 12th. I wouldn't have thought of that! I really appreciate everyones tips about the prep, and about generally dealing with the process. Lots of good advice here!

#4... I'm trying. I'm notoriously frugal... and I sprung for a bottle of my favorite lotion just because it makes me feel nice. Also, I started doing yoga again every morning before work, so at least my body feels better.

#5... I guess this is the hardest one. DH doesn't want anyone to know about this at this point... all of my closest friends are also close to DH, so nobody for me to talk with right now. While I respect his choice not to share what's happening with anyone other than me, this is hard! I really want to talk with my stepmom, who is one of my best friends. I will say, though, that I am trying to have a cup of tea with her often right now... even if I can't talk about it, there is something soothing about sitting with her and a warm pot of tea between us.

I have (and DH is aware) 'talked' with my oldest friend (his mom and mine were best friends in high school, and he and I grew up together) in VERY vague terms. Unfortunately, he is in the Dominican Republic right now, so I can't talk with him for real (we have only exchanged emails, and it's NOT the same). He will be sailing back to Florida soon - I can't wait to get him on the phone.

[Brandi]

GRRR! This is driving me crazy... they still haven't scheduled the test. I guess they are busy - but I want a date. DH isn't pushy... so it's looking like I'll have to be!

I'll warn DH about the prep - and he will be happy to hear that the test itself is 'easy.' I'll have to go shopping for some expensive TP; thanks for the warning!

DH and I did have a nice weekend. We made a special dinner together last night (African sweet potato peanut stew), and Saturday night was his work holiday party (they do it very late so that it won't conflict with other holiday plans - and so people are more relaxed). It was nice - I even got him to dance with me! It's usually like pulling teeth, and I didn't even have to ask twice.

I'm going to call his doctor's office right now. I know they won't tell me anything (for privacy reasons), but maybe I can get them to check on why the referral office hasn't called yet to set the appointment.

I want the recipe for your stew it sound interesting! And I looooove peanut anything. When you have time can you post it. Pleeeaaaassse!
My dh is very private about he's health too. He does not like me talking to anyone about it. And talking helps me so much. If I don't I explode! I did that last week with dh. I had been holding a few things for months and it all caught up with me.I am better now.
Once I talked to a friend about an issue with my dh's health. My dh got so mad at me! He asked why I couldn't just respect he's wishes. I am much more carful now. Having all these women here to talk to too (and Mr Silver) really helps. He has no idea when I ask ? here. It has helped me!

[Dogmama]

Thank you, Dogmama! VERY good advice...

#2... I was hugging him last night, and found myself imagining him all happy and healthy inside (it seems a bit silly, maybe, but it can't hurt... and it might even help).

I learned Reiki and sent my DH energy. I cannot tell you if it worked, but many nurses are learning Reiki. There is power in energy and prayer.

Kim